Grand Theft Auto V: Dirty Jobs
by scifiguy2005
Summary: The FIB has been dealt a serious blow to its operations following the actions and death of Steve Haines. Now an IAA agent has recruited a team of her own to take advantage of the situation and get whatever the Agency needs to solidify its presence on the West Coast. First story published on the site. Comments are welcome and I hope everyone enjoys!
1. Government Hookers

Another day, another beautiful and sunny afternoon in the state of San Andreas. The desert may be a craphole but the coastlines of Los Santos and Blaine County made SA a virtual paradise. Waves perfect for surfing. Alcoholic drinks never far away. The sun reflecting off the shimmering azure water. And typically lots of beautiful people hitting the sand in their bathing suits for more eye candy. Paleto Bay State Beach didn't have the crowds like Vaspucci Beach or Chumash but it was perfect for Evelyn Collins, who owned a home in the small town. In fact, the only thing she did more than fly planes was swim.

Like any other normal day in her off hours she spent it killing time under the ocean in her favorite aqua colored bikini. She emerged from the water clearing the remaining water away from her eyes and then put her sunglasses on. The excess water was shaken out of her long, fire-red mane of hair as she headed up away from the shoreline. Finally, she popped open a can of Sprunk soda and laid back in her lounge chair, ready for some sunbathing. Water continued to drip down her body and legs but the beaming sun would take care of that before long. The only thing missing was the radio next to her playing her favorite station to make it the perfect day.

Before she could turn on the radio her phone started ringing its usual faux-hip hop ringtone. The number wasn't one she recognized and the area code wasn't even local. Her initial thought was to ignore it and continue her sunbathing but strange numbers she didn't recognize was how she managed to find work when she came to Los Santos six months ago. Against better judgment she threw in her earpiece and hit ACCEPT. "Speak." she nearly barked out.

 _"Evelyn Collins?"_ A woman's voice asked on the other end. _"This is Agent Daniels. Karen Daniels? I'm not sure if you remember me from that job you did for us two months ago."_

"I remember you. From the Lab Raid. You put me and my crew through a lot of work and then paid us pennies for our troubles. To what do I owe the displeasure of speaking with you again?" Evelyn growled out while lying back in her chair.

Even with the obvious ferocity being thrown at her Agent Daniels kept the same professional tone she was trained to use. _"I could explain the details of your payment from last time but I'll cut to the chase. The answer to your question is money, Ms. Collins. You want it and I have work that will reward you substantially with it IF you can pull it off."_

"How much we talkin' here? Another paltry $500,000?" Asked Evelyn in a rather sarcastic manner.

 _"How does $2,000,000 to each of you sound?"_

The redhead nearly spit out her soda at hearing the dollar amount. Was this for real? She knew it was some kind of government contract but it almost seemed too good to be true. Unfortunately she couldn't let such a grand payday pass her by. Now more calm she responded. "I'm listening."

 _"I thought that would grab your attention. Let's meet in person. I'll give you the details then."_

"Alright. I'll bite. Where do you want to meet?"

 _"Your apartment on Alta Street. Bring two people you can trust. See you in an hour."_ Before Evelyn could say anything the call ended abruptly.

Part of her told her that she should have said no. The Humane Labs Raid was supposed to be a big job and they got screwed over. Small amount of cash and she didn't even get to keep the Valkyrie helicopter. But this was _$2,000,000_! She'd be out of her mind to not check it out at least.

No time was wasted in Evelyn gathering her things and hopping in her matte black Dukes. A massive cloud of smoke and black tracks were left in the wake behind the big car as it screamed off down the street, her phone already dialing up one of her partners-in-crime. "Jackie? It's Evelyn. Call Chad and tell him to be my place on Alta in the next hour. It's time to get back to get the crew back together."

Forty-five minutes later Evelyn was sitting on the couch in her Alta Street apartment now wearing what seemed to be her default outfit consisting of a light blue croptop-style tank, white hot pants and blue knee-high boots. By then the other two members of her crew had shown up.

The first, Chad, was a tall, tan man with black hair styled into a faux mohawk. As long as Evelyn had known him he could always be seen in a large black overcoat and black cargo pants with military boots. It made her wonder if he showered and slept in it, too. The two of them had first started working together on a job for a methed-up lunatic named Trevor Philips not long after she moved to LS and each considered the other to be something equivalent to friends in this fucked up city.

The other was a short Asian woman who went by the name Jackie. The way she always elected to take the least amount of money from their scores, coupled with how she looked to still be in her late teens, left Evelyn with the impression that she was some spoiled rich kid from Vinewood Hills who was only there to get off on the thrill of it all. What's more, despite her young age, she always dressed in designer clothes and was able to contribute a lot of the cash needed for job setups. A dangerous addiction but Evelyn felt she was in no position to judge. In her eyes the girl still held a higher chance of living longer than if she did drugs or drank heavily. The most notable feature about her aside from the flashy clothes was definitely her dark purple hair which she kept up in pigtails adding to her youthful appearance.

Evelyn's phone buzzed for what had to be the hundredth time in fifteen minutes alerting her to a status update on LifeInvader. "I know you like to be entertained, Jackie, but I told you it would be one hour. You don't have to update your LifeInvader status every two minutes with 'I'm bored."

Jackie was sitting at the kitchen's bar playing on her phone while Chad was doing upkeep on a pistol at the dining table. The radio in the living area was tuned in to West Coast Classics filling the room with Eazy-E's _No More ?'s_.

"Well I am. We haven't done anything in a month now. I can't help but feel the suspense when you don't give us any details on this job aside from 'It's big." Jackie said, finally sticking her phone in her pocket to Evelyn's relief.

Chad felt the need to chime in with his two cents. "She makes a good point, Evie. We waited a month for that mess with Merryweather and the FIB to die down before pulling another big job. Can't blame her for being a little excited." He said in his deep voice as he kept working on his gun.

"Hey, I'd give details if I had any. All I got was a phone call with an offer and instructions to wait one hour for this meet-up. I'm ready to get back to work just as much as you are but we have to be professionals, J." Evelyn explained. The group chat was suddenly interrupted by a loud knock on the door. Jackie's head instantly shot up at attention. "See? That's the client now." Evelyn made her way to the door and opened it for their guests.

Agent Daniels hurried through the door followed by what Evelyn assumed was a fellow agent. The only look she got at the two was brief as the pair breezed past her and headed for the Heist Planning Room, Daniels carrying a briefcase. "Heist Room. Now." She ordered. The trio of thieves followed them and each took a seat.

"Hello, everyone. Good to see you all again. No doubt you share the same sentiment to me." Karen smirked as she looked the crew over one-by-one as she stood in front of them all, her associate standing just to the side of her. "Jackie. Chad. Evelyn. How ya doing?"

Chad piped in first. "Clearly better than the feds since we haven't had to go through a shitstorm against the FIB for a little bit of money."

Karen sighed and threw her arms up a bit. "You've got me there. It is true that we've hit a rough patch with our funding. I won't ask how you know about that but it is one of the reasons why I'm here."

"Yes, we really feel for you poor souls, Agent Daniels. Knowing that you might have to face budget cuts and lose the ability to oppress the innocent." Said Jackie getting the woman's name off the ID badge hanging from her neck.

"First off, you all can just call me Karen. We're all basically friends now after helping each other out." Karen smiled more at them. Evelyn found it slightly creepy that she was being so friendly with them all of a sudden, unsure if it was genuine or a front to keep them off-guard. "Secondly, this concerns all of us. Agent Donovan, if you would be so kind as to show them what we're dealing with?"

The other agent took the briefcase from Karen and proceeded to unload its contents on the table. From what Evelyn could see there was a laptop, a tablet, and a notebook. Then he took to work marking things on the map that hung on the planning board writing things down on the dry erase board as he went.

"Besides," She continued as her co-worker was still going, "hasn't your friend here told you what's at stake for all of you?" When she finished everyone minus Donovan leered at her in a somewhat half-excited, half-curious way.

"$2 Million." She whispered under breath before raising her voice excidetly. " **TWO-FUCKIN'-MILLION DOLLARS!** "

"Are you for real?!" Jackie asked. Her face contorted strangely as she wasn't sure if she was to be happy or not. "Seriously?" She asked turning to Karen. Chad took in the information but waited for more before speaking up.

"You think I would lead you around like that? Of course I'm serious. Remember, we at the IAA take care of our own. Not like those FIB pricks who live in yesterday and make public safety a dick measuring contest. However, we have something we'd like you to help us with first." Karen was about to turn things over to the board when Chad angrily cut her off.

"And there it is! The catch. There's always something when it comes to you government spooks. What do we have to do? Kidnap some VIP? Invade a third-world country? Steal a nuke?" He started to list off _very_ sarcastically. "Oh! I know! Prevent World War III by assassinating a despot who happens to be the leader of a group of Russian ultranationalists!" The last one caused Evelyn to giggle and snort a little.

The IAA agent wasn't above smirking herself and, surprisingly, looked as though she might let loose a laugh. But of course she kept it in and composed herself to continue. "Oh, I assure you it's nothing so serious. Not yet anyway. Take a look at the board and you'll see what needs to be done." Two places were circled on the map: Sandy Shores Airfield and Paleto Bay State Beach. "What we have planned for you is a little exchange of goods. They have weapons that they're trying to sell to some unsavory figures in South America that we will requisition from them and sell to some of _our_ friends in the Caribbean. The requisition part will simply involve you three taking out whoever they've hired, presumably dirty cops on their payroll, stealing their aircraft once it's loaded with product, and then flying it to Paleto Bay where we will have a pilot ready to take over for you and fly it on to our eager customers. It couldn't be simpler."

"And this 'requisition' is worth Two-Mill?" Jackie asked.

"That, my friends, is where this comes in." Karen grabbed the tablet that was laying on the table. Her fingers glided across the touchscreen as they went to work. "There. We. Go! I think you will find that decent." The three of them were about to look at each other and her in confusion when their phones started going off at the same time. All three had the same alert saying that a deposit had been made in their bank account. $500,000 to be precise.

"What's this?" Asked Evelyn, staring at the screen and then back at Karen.

"This is an advance payment for the requisition job. That should get you set up with whatever you need and you just might have a little spending money left over." Karen now started pacing the floor eying the trio's faces as she went. Evelyn started wondering if she was trying to profile them at the same time as giving her description of the job but stayed silent. "You pull this off and it shows how capable you are to my bosses. They see this done and you get the go ahead for what comes after and _then_ , the rest of the money."

"How capable?" Chad shot up out of his chair. It looked as if he might try tackling the agent to the ground but he stopped directly in her face. " _What the fuck?!_ So I guess we didn't prove ourselves when we were going against Merryweather to steal some helicopter or sneaking aboard an aircraft carrier to steal a jet just so you could get some goddamn computer files?! This is bullshit, man!"

Slowly Karen started to laugh and looked around at the group. Chad, however, was not amused. "The hell is so funny all of a sudden?"

"Just that you think you have a choice in the matter." She continued laughing softly and smiling at them.

"What do you mean?" Asked Evelyn worriedly.

"I was told to make you cooperate no matter what. You know, the money was my idea to show you that we're friends in the hopes that you would sign on willingly. But apparently it has come to Plan B." Karen tapped a few more times on the tablet. On the laptop CCTV footage popped up of them doing The Merryweather Heist's sub-jobs from the aircraft carrier to taking on the Lab itself. "We have enough to put each of you away for life which, given the conditions of Bollingbroke, apparently isn't very long."

Evelyn and Jackie pulled Chad back away from Karen. He was still fuming. Mostly because he didn't trust this woman as far as he could throw her but didn't have any choice but to do the Agency's dirty work. He took to kicking a chair across the room instead of planting his foot in her ass like he wanted. "Fine." He growled out as he backed off across the room.

"We'll do it." Evelyn added. "When do we start?"

"Tomorrow night around 10:00 PM." Karen said walking in front of Evelyn. She got a good view of Karen's facial features. For a hardnosed government stooly she wasn't bad looking. "I'm glad you see things my way. This is why I like _you_ , Evelyn. Unlike some people you can listen to reason." She flashed a smile at the redhead before her partner moved to the door having collected their things. "Well I guess that'll do it." Her head turned to Donovan. "Got everything?"

Donovan gave Karen a big doofy grin as he held up the briefcace. "All ready to go, Karen."

The smile instantly disappeared from the senior agent's face. "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware we were on a first name basis."

And now Donovan's smile disappeared and was replaced by an expression of confusion and fear. "B-but I thought you said we're all friends."

"No. I said that we, meaning they and I," Karen pointed at the three thieves and herself, "are friends. _You_ and I are co-workers. You're a newbie on probation and I'm the poor sap who has to be your SO. You show me some respect and only refer to me as Agent Daniels or so help me God, I _will_ bust your ass back to being a metermaid in Liberty City. Got it?" Donovan looked ready to crap his pants but he managed to nod his head. "Good. Now get in the fucking car." He complied and left the room immediately. The senior agent returned her attention to the other three. "Alright. Glad to see everyone's on the same page. I'll leave you to get ready and see you tomorrow night." With that she left as well with the thieves going back to the living area.

Once Karen was in the elevator and it was moving down all three of them planted their butts in the sofa and chairs around the coffee table. Chad was still furious on the inside about being roped into helping the Feds while Evelyn wasn't sure if everything would go as smooth as Karen explained. Finally after a few minutes Jackie broke the silence that had befallen the room. "Well I say we get some rest to do this thing. No point in us turning down easy money."

"I don't like the blackmail angle but we might as well. It's certainly not as bad as the alternative." Evelyn added. She and Jackie gave a smile and a nod to each other and then they turned to Chad who had finished putting his gun back together.

After another brief moment of silence where he looked back and forth at his two comrades he sighed. "Okay, okay. We'll do it."

Jackie threw her arms into the air. "Yes! We're back, bitches!"

Evelyn quickly interjected. "I hate to rain on your parade, J, but let's just see how tomorrow goes. If something happens that we don't like, we initiate a backup plan. Agreed?" The other two nodded. "Alright. Now let's get some sleep."

Jackie elected to crash on Evelyn's sofa while Chad went home to his own place. She spent a few minutes lying on her bed staring out the large windows. She couldn't stop thinking about Karen and how uneasy she felt around her. From being nice one second to terrifying the next. The woman was almost impossible to read. She probably owed quite a bit to her government training for that coupled with natural charisma. Evelyn knew she'd have to even the odds somehow to remotely stand a chance of coming out ahead of the IAA and she knew just the person to see about it.


	2. Too Fast For Love

Evelyn got an early start the next morning. She left Jackie passed out on the sofa, which suited her just fine since this would be something she'd have to do alone. The drive across town gave her a bit of time to think about what she was going to say when she got to where she was going in El Burro Heights. Problem was she didn't have the slightest clue what to say to someone she hadn't seen or talked to in nearly a month and a half. The most she could figure was that she might have a chance of persuading him with words alone but the guy rarely worked with others without getting something out of it himself. Evelyn was definitely going to have her Charisma and Persuasion skills put to the test today. Before she knew it her Bagger motorcycle was pulling right and up the road of her old "colleague's" house and a few seconds later came to a stop.

"Last chance to back out, Evelyn." She started to mumbling to herself under her breath as she pulled off her motorcycle helmet and then shook her hair loose. "No. I never had a choice in this. Gotta do this for the team." The biker took a deep breath and headed up the steps to the house, her tight black leather jacket and pants making a slight squeaking sound with every step until she stopped at the door. "Here goes." Her finger hit the doorbell but she heard no sound of it from inside like one normally would. The thought of turning around and leaving right then crossed her mind until she noticed the closed-circuit TV camera to the side of the door started to move. "Hey, Lester. What's up?" She said looking into the camera. It was after she spoke up that she realized how stupid she sounded. _Oh yeah, he'll just open right up for a damn social visit._ A bit to her surprise the door buzzed and she heard a lock unbolt on the other side. _Then again, maybe he will._ She fought back a slight smirk as she walked in the door. There, sitting at his usual place at the computer, was the best hacker she ever knew.

Lester Crest. The short, balding, anti-social weirdo who once gave them odd jobs and their first and last heists. The guy was a bit strange when it came to interacting with others but his skills with a computer were unparalleled. Plus, he still wasn't as strange as that Trevor guy. Lester didn't take his eyes off his computer screen as Evelyn approached him from behind. From what she could see looking over his shoulder there was a feed from some girls webcam who didn't seem aware that she was being watched. Evelyn made a note to later tear out all of the webcams attached to her devices. "Long time no see, Collins. Given all the silence on the police channels lately I was sure you'd retired at the ripe old age of 27."

Evelyn chuckled. "Not quite yet. Just lying low while all that stuff with Merryweather and the FIB was tearing up half the damn state."

"Smart move. The people responsible for that barely got out alive themselves." The window on his desktop closed out before he turned around in his wheelchair to finally face Evelyn. "But I'm sure you're not here to catch up with an old friend. Did you?"

Straight to the point it was, then. Good thing she didn't take much thought into small talk. "I hope you don't take this the wrong way but no, not exactly. My crew and I have a problem I think you can help us with."

"Another problem. Seems like people only come to me when they have a problem that needs sorted out." His voice rose a bit in slight annoyance.

Evelyn sighed and took a step back. "Look. If you're not interested I can just go and forget you even exist."

"No!" Lester blurted out, managing to ease his voice back down to it's usual soft but very frank tone. "You need information and trading it is my primary business. Tell me about it."

"Remember that Lab Raid that we did a couple of months back? Turns out that the IAA agent we dealt with has been keeping tabs on me and my crew ever since and now this agent, Karen Daniels, is looking to us to do some contract work for the Agency. I don't think we have much to worry about from her but I feel like we need to know who we're dealing with here." She said as she started leaning back against the wall with both legs crossed. "You think you could help us out somehow?"

Lester paused for a moment. From what Evelyn could tell he seemed to be running things in his own as he contemplated the offer. "Talk about déjà vu." Evelyn was about to ask what he meant by it but he started talking again. "I can do it but it will take some time to crack the IAA's network. When's your first job?"

"Tonight around 10 PM." Evelyn answered. This was looking to be a lot easier than she ever thought it would be.

"Check back with me tomorrow. I should have something for you by then. It won't be easy like the FIB but it can be done." Lester said. Evelyn was about to sigh a breath of relief and then Lester spoke the next sentence. "Now, there's just the matter of payment for this brokering of information."

 _Fuck._ "I've got around $500,000 to spare. How about I give you $150,000 up front, and then the remaining $350,000 is yours if you find anything useful?" She asked nervously. Lester's services were worth the money but she wanted to make sure she came out ahead in what little business was to be had in this venture of blackmail from the IAA.

The hacker gave another pause. "If you've got so much to throw around up front then I can safely assume there's an even bigger score to come."

The biker woman started to frown on the inside. In her head she could see the profits of the job starting to dwindle in large sums. _Maybe going to this pervy hacker wasn't such a good idea after all. Don't tell me he's going to want in on the job as well._

"I tell you what. We'll call it a deal for $250,000 up front and you do a job for me in the future." The dollar amount seemed steep to Evelyn but she knew there would be no way of talking him down. Besides, his job would probably just be stealing some data file from the police again. No big.

"You've got a deal." She motioned to shake the guy's hand but remembered what his computer had been on just before they started talking. Instead she simply nodded her head.

"Alright." Lester turned back to the computer to get back to "work." "You found your way back here so I'm sure you should have no problem finding your way out." He said bluntly as a not-so-subtle hint that he wished to be alone now. Without another word Evelyn made her way back out to her bike.

She sat her shiny behind on the motorcycle's seat when her phone started ringing. It was Chad. No doubt calling to see what they were going to do to pull off the job later. "Hey, Chad. I was just about come over to your place. We have some things to discuss. Yeah. I can join you for a drive. I'll be right over."

Roy Lowenstein Boulevard was a short drive away from El Burro and was where Chad kept one of his garages. It was where he tinkered his cars using parts not available not readily available at the local Los Santos Customs. The place was all shut up as though no one was there despite Chad telling her to meet up there. Chad gave her a spare key to the place so she let herself in. Inside were five cars in varied state of disrepair. A couple of them had been stripped down to the chassis' framework while others were simply missing hoods and tires. One in particular stood out for being under a large black tarp. "Strange. I wonder what's so special about that one. Mini-tank?" She chuckled and was tempted to take a peek before the garage door suddenly opened again. Sitting outside was a cherry red Monroe sports car, Chad behind the wheel as usual. "There you are." She started as she headed out to the car. "Nice car. Not really your style but still nice."

Chad reached over and opened the door for his friend. "Just running a quick errand. Figured we could talk on the way."

Evelyn hopped in and shut the door. "Errand, huh? In this beauty? Did some movie star ask you to wash it?" The car pulled out of the parking lot as the door closed itself via remote. She rolled the window down and sat her arm on the top of the door.

"Oh yeah, I was just taking it to Poppy Mitchell now." He joked. "Just a repo job for some quick cash. So tell me what's going on. Jackie called and said you were out early."

"Just taking out some insurance. Lester's going to do some digging for us. All we have to do is a quick job for him later." Evelyn said rather nonchalantly while she looked through the glove box.

"That shouldn't be complicated." He glanced over at the woman and couldn't help but do a double take as she seemed to be rummaging through the interior of the fancy car. "What are you doing?"

"Looking for..." Her hands pulled down the sun visor where a pair of sunglasses fell into her lap, "...these!" In a second the aviators were placed on her face along with a playful smile when she noticed Chad was going between watching the road and looking at her like how a sane person is trying to figure out someone sets their hair on fire. "What? It's bright out here."

Chad laughed a bit, not refusing the urge to ruffle her hair as they headed up Alta Street. The traffic was normal for a sunny morning with nothing out of the ordinary. That is, until they got to the intersection for Vespucci Boulevard and Alta. The pair was stopped at a red light when Evelyn noticed a silver Baller fast approaching behind them in the side view mirror. "Would that happen to interest you?"

Chad pulled his sunglasses down, checked the central rear view mirror, and then looked back through the rear glass. "I think it would." His head shot forward where a two more of the SUVs came from both sides of the intersection and came to a dead stop to try boxing them in.

Evie's eyes went wide with surprise and her voice started to shake as she assessed their current situation. "Who did you repo this car from?" She asked, her hand starting to reach for her pistol under her jacket.

"Just a Balla who happened to default on his 'loan." Unlike Evie he was still pretty calm. Not much of a surprise to her, though. It took a lot to shake Chad up. Instead of a gun Chad produced a cassette tape from his jacket and shoved it into the car's tape player. A small hint of a piano gave way to a guitar solo. "Hold on to something." The engine under the hood revved to life just as several gangbangers emerged from their vehicles brandishing shotguns and submachine guns. They barely got out of the way when the car was thrown into gear and sped forward and through their makeshift roadblock just as the music hit a spike into full-blown power metal.

The old sports car was surprisingly quick to accelerate a good distance away from the gang members who quickly scurried back into their cars to give chase. Chad drove the car a few blocks down Alta before pulling the emergency brake to throw the car into a tight spin, spinning it right around for them to head back the way they came. Right before one of the Ballers could block them once more he drifted right onto Vespucci Boulevard. Evelyn looked back to see the large SUVs sloppily making the same turn behind them, nearly taking out a Smart Car in the process.

"You think you could have mentioned that you stole a car from the Ballas?" She asked as she turned back around.

"Didn't seem like a big deal." Chad responded. The car expertly weaved in and out of traffic to the sound of horns blaring from angry drivers who were no doubt throwing many obscenities at them. The lead Baller behind them resorted to less skillful tactics and simply rammed most of the cars out of its way. He swerved the car sharply when it turned into South Rockford Drive. When he checked the mirror again he saw one of the chasing cars get sideswiped by a garbage truck but the other two remained hot on their heels. "Please, by all means feel free to help out at any time."

"I thought it wasn't a big deal." Evelyn was laughing so loudly it was nearly drowning out The Donnas' cover of Too Fast For Love that was screaming through the stereo speakers.

"OK, so I may have miscalculated a little bit. Good enough?" He asked right before a couple of bullets shattered the rear glass of the classic car.

"Well if you insist." Now she pulled out her AP Pistol and unbuckled her seatbelt. Another bullet whizzed past her window before Chad managed to find a patch of road that was clear on her side. Both feet locked underneath the dash and then finally her door swung open. Her body contorted enough for her to twist her upper half to face backwards while she sped along inches above the ground. Time seemed to slow down for her now. The automatic in her hand raised in front of her face where she unloaded a clip at the leading pursuit vehicle. In mere seconds blood splattered all over the interior and back on the glass before the windscreen completely shattered. The large SUV swerved out of control into an oncoming Dominator where it proceeded to knock both cars onto the sidewalk. Evelyn was about to reload her gun but Chad grabbed her jacket and pulled her back inside right before a lightpost slammed the door shut. "Was that helpful enough?"

"You're welcome for not having your head smashed in." He responded very sarcastically. The last pursuer was coming up fast behind them now. "I think I've got this one." Suddenly the car jerked left and then took a couple of rights to head down Bay City Avenue.

"Are you gonna do what I think you're gonna do?" Evelyn asked nervously.

"Yup." Said her driver confidently.

"I thought you'd say that." She braced herself once more for what was coming. The car had just passed the turn-off to the Great Ocean Highway. Chad turned left over the sidewalk and into a small grassy field that led downhill. She checked one last time to see if the remaining car was there. The side mirror being completely shot off gave her the answer.

"Here we go!" That was all Chad said as the car reached a small ramp placed at the edge of the hill below. The Monroe rocketed through the air over the Great Ocean Highway. Evelyn couldn't stop herself from being as giddy as a schoolgirl the whole time and laughing like she was on a carnival ride. She thought it was a shame that no one was around to film the epic jump. The car came to a hard landing on Vespucci Beach where Chad e-braked it into a turning stop right as the music finished as if by perfect timing. The two looked up at the Baller which attempted the same jump but fell short and wound up flipping over, no doubt seriously injuring all of the passengers inside.

Evie had to get out of the car to walk off the high she was on. The massive smile on her face certainly wasn't leaving anytime soon. Her eyes looked over the damage to the car. The bumper was hanging off the driver side a bit, both headlights were smashed, the paint was scratched all over, the passenger side door was completely dented in from where the lamppost hit it with a missing mirror on the same side, bulletholes were riddled in the backside of the car, and a hubcap was missing. But on the plus side, the front windshield was perfectly intact. "The owner of this thing is going to be pisssssssed." She said jokingly and then took a deep breath.

Chad joined her, taking notice of the ambulance that was now arriving on the scene. "I get paid for bringing the car. He said nothing about the condition."

"That's good. Hope it was worth it to him." Now Evie could hear police sirens coming their way to join the ambulance that was already on the scene. "We done with our warm-up now?" She asked now that she was a tad more calm and got back in the wrecked car.

Chad laughed. "Warm-up? Girl, this is everyday for me." He said opening the door to get back in as well.

"Oh, it's everyday. That's exactly why you were begging me to shoot up that car." Evelyn shot back, starting to laugh a little more.

"You know I'm more of a driver than a shooter. Besides, I had to make sure retirement didn't dull your skills." He shut the driver's side door which caused the windshield to shatter into thousands of pieces all over the dashboard. A silence fell over the car as Evelyn smirked at Chad. "Don't say it."

"Retirement didn't dull _whose_ skills now?" She laughed once more before the car was put in gear and they headed down the road to deliver the car in relative peace.


	3. When A Plan Comes Together

An hour later Evelyn and Chad arrived at the Bean Machine on South Mo Milton Street where Jackie was sitting out front. As to be expected she had a large cup in one hand and her phone in the other. Her head was bobbing along to whatever music was being pumped through her pair of Beat Off headphones. Jackie happened to look up to find Evelyn leaning against the table while Chad was busy paying the driver of the cab that brought them there.

Jackie pulled her headphones down and passed her coffee to Evelyn. "'Bout time you guys got here. What's with the cab?"

Evelyn took a much needed dose of caffeine. That sweet nectar was piping hot but was just the jolt she needed after all the excitement of the morning. "Let's just say that it involves a car, some Ballas, and a guy threatening to call the cops if we didn't stop holding his dog hostage."

"You extorted money through some guy's dog? So a typical repo job for a guy who didn't like his ride being shot up. Got it!" The teen let loose a laugh as Chad joined the group after the cab finally drove off.

"You get everything ready?" He asked taking the coffee from Evelyn and taking a big gulp himself. Thanks to Evelyn and Jackie the vanilla latté now had a hint of strawberry and cherry mixed together. It was certainly an interesting flavor combination that he hoped never to taste again unless he was in a bar with a couple of girls all over him. Just not Jackie and Evelyn, though. The idea of taking out his best friends just flatout weirded him out.

Jackie finally got her drink back and took down whatever was left in the cup. Why did it have the taste of chocolate cake now? "Yeah, I got the stuff. You wouldn't believe what I had to go through to get it though." She got up and lead the others around the side of the building where she parked her midnight purple Sultan TT. She gave the trunk a gentle tap of her fist and it popped right open. Initially it looked empty until she took off the magenta floor covering. Weapons ranging from a few pistols to sniper rifles lay in the cavity, all heavily customized for a team of professionals.

The perky teen's face lit up like a firecracker at the sight of their new toys, most notably the bright pink sniper rifle Evelyn picked up. "Pink? _Really?_ " The redhead asked looking it over as Chad checked out the new submachine gun she bought.

"Yes pink, silly. It's for me, after all. You wouldn't be so quick to judge if you knew what I had to go through for this stuff." She said pulling the Marksman Rifle away from Evelyn.

"A quick run to Ammu-Nation? How was _that_ difficult?" Chad asked as he put the gun back in the trunk. He and Evelyn were naturally perplexed and both tilted their heads in the same curious expression just as a dog would.

"Well, first I had to meet some Jamaican guy down in Strawberry behind the Vanilla Unicorn. Naturally he was fifteen minutes late." She put the sniper rifle back in the car, replaced the floor cover, and closed the trunk. Now she turned around to lean on the back of the car and face the others. "When he finally shows up I can tell right away that he's totally blitzed out of his mind. I'm talking enough smoke to put military gas grenades to shame is coming out of this beater he calls a ride. Fortunately he was able to focus enough to show me the goods but before I can make an offer he feels the need to give me his life story. Goes on and on about how his boss in Liberty City sent him out here to 'expand the business.' And then when I do finally make my offer he says it's too low but will meet it if I set him up with some dances in the club."

Evelyn and Chad gave each other a silent look of even more curiousness as the story went on. At least they were both invested now. "So you got to see a show while we were dodging Ballas and taking care of business?" Asked Evelyn crossing her arms.

"When you put it like that it makes me sound like a heartless bitch who would forget her bestest friends in the whole wide world. Lucky for you I'm not. Now close your eyes. Both of you. Close 'em!" Evie and Chad just looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders in defeat. Might as well see what she got them. They closed their eyes and then felt Jackie put something in their hands. "Okay! Now open 'em up!"

They opened their eyes to find a sizeable bag of weed in their hands. Enough to get them a fat wad of cash if sold to the right people. "Oh. Weed. How….nice?" Asked Evelyn quite unsure of how she felt about their "present."

"The Jamaican gave it to me as a bonus for setting him the club. He said it was some new age, experimental-type stuff. Didn't think you guys would mind if I passed it along to you." Jackie said still rather excitedly.

"I appreciate you thinking of us, Jackie," Evelyn started. "but I think I'd rather have a buttload of coffee instead. How about you sell this and we'll have enough booze and pizza to celebrate all night long after we finish the job?" She handed the bag back to Jackie. As huge as the drug trade in Los Santos was, Evelyn didn't like the stuff at all. Chad handed his back as well though he didn't give a reason for it.

"Well, if you guys insist. Don't be surprised if it's ten four cheese pizzas with three cheese stuffed crust." Jackie threw the bags in the trunk. Her tongue licked her lips just thinking of that delicious meal that would await them.

"Sounds like we're all set aside from clothes." Said Chad trying to bring the conversation back to the business at hand.

"I got that right after the guns. Left 'em at Evie's place." Jackie added before moving around to the driver's-side door of her car.

The others got in as well with Evelyn calling shotgun and Chad getting in the back. "Alright, guys. Now all we have to do is wait for tonight. We're all familiar with the airfield so there's no need to scout the location." Evelyn started with their rundown of the mini-heist they were about to perform. Jackie placed her phone in its embedded rest on the dash followed by the computer screen on the central console coming to life with a map of the area. "Jackie, I want you with your rifle up on that watertower to the north. These cops are bound to set up sentries to scare off any idiots in the area. You plug 'em to give me some cover so I can move in from your position. Chad'll be at the end of the runway where there will most likely be fewer sentries patrolling. If necessary he can move in quickly to provide support in case things go south. We can't afford to damage whatever aircraft might have the product loaded on it so stealth and coordination will be key in successfully pulling this off." Evelyn took a second to look around. "Any comments or questions?"

Chad spoke up first. "Sounds good but I think you might have a better shot at getting to that aircraft if Jackie sets up on that hill from the south while you sneak up to the bird. We can clear all sides of the runway and force them to fall back inside the hangar."

Jackie nodded in agreement. "Sounds solid. They're local cops working off the books. We shouldn't have to worry about them carrying artillery or calling for backup. They wouldn't dare risk another scandal after that mess in Paleto Bay."

"It's settled then. Once I'm in the air I want you guys to clear out as soon as possible. We don't have to take all of them out so long as that bird gets delivered." Evelyn closed the map as the others voiced their agreement at the plan. The only thing left to do now was call their new IAA overlords.

Evelyn dialed the contact number she was given and placed the phone to her ear. After a few rings Karen answered. _"Evelyn! So good to hear from you. Have you and your team put a plan in place for the party tonight?"_

"A rushed one but yeah, we got something in order." Evelyn answered, trying to make it obvious that she was a bit exasperated from having to rush the pieces of a job together in such a short amount of time.

Karen's continued on in a very happy tone almost like she was trying to stay on their good side. _"Glad to hear it. I knew a team of professionals like you wouldn't have a problem. We'll be listening in to all of their channels so there won't be a need to contact us until you're on your way. I'm looking forward to seeing the results. See you then."_ She hung up before the Heist Leader could put in a word. That seemed to be standard operating procedure for the IAA regarding their outsourced black ops teams.

Evelyn stuck her phone back in her jacket pocket. "We're on for tonight. Now all we have to do is wait. Anyone wanna catch a movie? I hear that Meltdown flick is amazing." She smiled a bit and Jackie voiced her agreement. The three headed off to the cinema to kill time. Tonight was gonna mark the beginning of their comeback tour.


	4. No Fly Zone

Night had finally fallen over Sandy Shores. The trio of thieves arrived at the airfield under the cover of darkness using Evelyn's black Stanier. Chad was dropped off outside the edge of the airfield so he wouldn't alert whoever might be guarding that area. Evelyn parked the car in the area between the airfield and the Yellow Jack Inn where she and Jackie could silently come up to a hill that would serve as Jackie's vantage point. All three of them looked nearly identical wearing all black fatigues and ski masks. Jackie stood out due to being the shortest of the group but her role as sniper would ensure that no one got close enough to tell.

Jackie lay prone on the hill where she set-up her weapon, the basic Sniper Rifle with an advanced scope and suppressor in a black finish. Evelyn lay down next to her with a pair of binoculars to scope out the airfield. "Chad. We're in position. How are things on your end?" Evelyn asked over the radio.

Chad was in the middle of silently dispatching one of the two guards at the end of the runway when the call came through. "Just got done taking out the sentries.I'm kind of amazed they didn't bother wearing any body armor." He responded immediately after digging his knife into one of the guards' neck.

Evelyn chuckled a bit. "Local cops, remember? They probably have everyone in town scared shitless. No way anyone would be dumb enough to interrupt business and expect to continue existing."

"Security looks tighter around the hanger." Jackie broke in, running surveillance of the scene. "Got a couple of unmarked Buffalos blocking access from the road. I can also see two Blazer ATVs parked in the hanger."

Evelyn peered through the binoculars in her hands. Sitting perfectly center in the crowd was a Cuban 800 airplane. It was completely black and had a hose attached to each wing that was connected to a couple of large pumps. "The plane is in the middle of refueling. The cargo must already be loaded. That should save some time."

"Only six guys guarding the place. One walking around the helipad by those empty crates, one by the hanger, one standing between the Buffalos, two at the foot of the control tower, one checking out the plane, and one is in the control tower, no doubt making sure everyone steers clear of the area." Jackie added.

"Chad could take care of him as long as you make sure no one's looking that way while he's going up the tower stairs. We probably don't have to worry about these guys calling for backup but let's not take chances." Evelyn got up on her knee and stashed the binoculars in one of her cargo pants' pocket. "Everyone ready?" Chad and Jackie sounded off that they were ready. "Alright. Let's do it." She said before pulling down her mask. As Evelyn moved closer to a crate that was sitting on the runway's edge, Chad was already making his way to the control tower.

The crew leader crouched behind the crate, peeking out slightly to see one of the polo shirt/jeans clad cops making his way towards her. She was about to call it in when Jackie let loose a round from her rifle that found it's home in the man's skull. Without missing a beat Evelyn caught him before he could hit the ground and dragged the corpse out of sight behind the crate. She flashed Jackie a thumbs up which got a light kissing sound in response.

By the time Evelyn worked her way up to one of the Buffalos Chad had found his way to the backside of the control tower. One of the guards started circling around the back of the tower. It was when he turned to face the wall when he figured out the guy was taking a piss break. The perfect opportunity for him to come up from behind and knock him out with a blow to the head. Chad managed to avoid getting hit by the guy's stream as he laid him on the ground softly. "J, I got one of the guys 'round back of the tower. I can get the other one as long as the guy by the plane doesn't look around."

"That could be problematic." Said Evelyn. "I just overheard the one by the Buffalo say the plane is almost done refuelling." She plugged the guy in the head as soon as he walked around the side of the car. "You'll have to take out the radioman in the tower, J. We'll see what we can do before the other two notice what's going on."

"Roger that." The sniper aligned her sight on the radio operator in the control tower. He was on a cycle of answering the radio and going back to a slots game on the computer next to him. The FIB's finest at "work." She took in a deep breath, slowly exhaled the oxygen in her lungs, and pulled the trigger.

 _CRACK!_

The bullet embedded itself in the glass of the tower's window but didn't penetrate. All Jackie could think now was, _SHIT!_ The operator bolted out of his seat at the sound, instantly alerting the others that they were not alone. "Guys, bad news. The tower had bulletproof glass. We've gotta move."

"We're under attack! Find the intruders and kill them!" Said the operator over the radio. The remaining guard by the stairs readied his carbine rifle as he headed out to where his missing comrades were last. Chad was already peering around the corner when the man left his post. He wasted no time in heading up the unguarded stairs. With a loud bang he kicked the door in, filling the operator full of bullets from his submachine gun.

The off-duty cop by the plane was pulling the hoses out of the plane posthaste. Unlike the gunman walking around he was clearly freaking out. Now that the operator had gone silent it only intensified drastically. He didn't even care that the fuel pumps were still partially leaking fuel from the hoses he'd thrown on the ground. Just like that he was in the cockpit and starting up the engines to flee the scene.

The lone gunman reached the crates where the body of the dead cop was lying, now with a thick pool of blood pouring from the hole in his skull. Before he could react the sniper put a quick shot in his chest forcing him to the ground. He wasn't dead but there was no way he'd be getting back up anytime soon. Jackie got back on the radio to Evelyn. "The pilot's getting ready to blow this place. We're losing our window fast."

Evelyn was already running to the hanger. "Don't worry. I've got an idea. You guys get clear, alright?"

"You got it, boss." Said Jackie. She got up, picked up her gun, and headed back for the car.

"The radio's going crazy. We've got minutes before they send someone to check." Chad said as he stepped outside to see the plane starting to move down the runway.

"We won't be here in a few minutes." Evelyn sped past Chad on one of the Blazers to give chase to the plane. She was almost at the left wing when the pilot opened his door brandishing a Micro SMG. Bullets ricocheted off the wing barely missing Evelyn as she moved from side-to-side. If he wasn't careful he would destroy the plane before killing her. She dropped around to the other side where the pilot wouldn't be able to see her approach.

Thinking he'd shaken her at last, he closed the door and put the gun down next to him. Unfortunately for him Evelyn was already up to the right wing. Carefully she put her legs on the seat of the four-wheeler to keep her balance. Once she was as close as she could possibly get she leapt onto the wing, the ATV slowing down to a stop behind the plane. She threw the door open surprising the pilot inside. She grabbed the gun and tossed it out before he could grab it and then made her way inside. Before dealing with his new passenger, the pilot had to pull the plane into the air as they were about to run out of pavement.

Once they were airborne and she shut the door, Evelyn grabbed his head and slammed it on the console. It left him dazed but he still pulled out a knife. The blade awkwardly went past the side of her face where she forcefully took him by the wrist and knocked the knife out of his hand. While she was distracted by making sure the knife didn't land on her he managed to land a punch to her face. The force of the blow sent her head back where it hit the glass of the door, cracking it a bit. Due to the struggle in the cockpit taking attention away from actually flying the plane the aircraft pitched into an aileron roll to the right. The pilot tried to level out the aircraft but Evelyn took her opening and pulled the wheel sharply to the left. The sudden roll, mere feet off the ground, threw the pilot off-guard enough for Evelyn to pull her gun while he struggled to level the plane. She shot him in the chest four times and then his body slumped over, leaving her in complete control.

She was about to exhale when she realized the plane was headed straight for a radio tower. She was able to bank hard to the right and out before it collided. When she finally pulled it up in the sky and was level she pulled her mask off to put on the radio headset. She changed the radio frequency to match that of her friends and the Agency who were now waiting for them on the beach. "Good news, everyone.I have the packages. Making my way to the dropoff point."

Agent Daniels cracked through the radio. "Glad to hear it. We're all waiting for you in Paleto Bay. Your crew is already here. How's the plane?"

"Seems okay." Said Evelyn looking around the cockpit. Her cool demeanor lessened when she saw smoke pouring from the left engine. _Damn. Must have gotten hit when the guy was shooting._ ""Scratch that, base. I've taken damage to the left engine. Probably won't make it to the landing zone." Just as she said that the engine caught fire. Miraculously the craft was still in the air but was starting to pull to the left.

"Roger that. Can you ditch with the package intact?"

"Not gonna happen. I'm in a Cuban 800 so I can probably try dropping the goods from the bomb doors. Copy?" She was struggling even more to keep it steady as she flew over the mountains on approach to the beach.

"Copy that. We'll be waiting. Out." The line went silent leaving Evelyn with her thoughts. Another quick check of the engine revealed the fire was starting to go out however, so was the engine itself. Now finally over the mountains she closed the gap to the strip of beach that had been selected. A few car lights in a circle let her know the spot to drop cargo.

From the ground Agent Daniels could see the bomb bay doors on the underside of the plane open. The moonlight was the only way anyone could see the smoke trailing from the wing. Several crates fell out before the plane flew overhead. Inside Evelyn was barely keeping control until all packages were clear. Once the cargo indicator flashed empty she knew to get out before the plane crashed into the water. She threw the headset away and jumped out the door.

The impact of the water was still hard but the armor sewn into her clothing took most of the force. Her body skipped across the water like a stone for a few minutes before finally slowing to a stop. All the sounds of water around her drowned out the sound of the plane crashing. Pain shot through her entire body as she noticed the plane in the water and watched it slowly sink beneath the waves of the ocean. She worked through the pain long enough to swim back to shore where she found Daniels' people hard at work loading the cargo into SUVs. Jackie ran up and gave her a big hug.

Evelyn winced from pain but returned the hug. "Good to see you, too, Jackie. Is everything good here?"

Agent Daniels approached her from one of the SUVs where she was directing the loading of the weapons. "A few busted crates but the hardware itself is still intact. You seem to be pretty intact yourself." Karen smiled at Evelyn. The last time she did that Evelyn wasn't sure how to take it. This time, for some reason, she took it as fairly genuine and actually gave her one back.

"Comes with the job, Agent Daniels...erm, Karen." Replied Evelyn as she looked over the agent. She was still dressed in her tan suit pants but only had her blue blouse on top instead of the suit jacket which showed off her figure quite well. With the heat going through just a few hours ago she didn't blame Karen for looking a little more informal. "So do we get a pass?"

"I just got the word shortly before you arrived. Our operation is a go." Karen said as Jackie finally broke her hug from Evelyn. Karen handed Evelyn some dry clothes for her to change into. "Get changed, get some sleep, and we'll be in touch. Good work."

"No problem." Said Evelyn taking the clothes from Karen. With another smile Karen walked away to her car and got in now that the weapons were completely loaded. The agents finally left with a dust trail in the wake of their vehicles. Chad and Jackie were the only ones around her now. Chad sat in the Stanier listening to the radio while Evelyn took a moment to change clothes.

She and Jackie piled into the car a few minutes later. "Well, I'd say we're definitely back in business. Shall we celebrate with drinks at Evie's place?" Jackie joked and laughed as they left the beach.


	5. Poker Face

A very loud knock resonated throughout Evelyn's high-rise apartment. She wouldn't have been able to hear it at all if not for the fact that she had fallen into an unconscious mess on the living room floor. Her head was pounding from the hangover she would now be suffering from the rest of the day. Her mouth opened but it could only do so for a yawn and that segued into loud groaning.

She wasn't able to to get her full bearings before another round of knocks sent thunder through her poor, aching eardrums. "Alright, alright! I'm coming!" Somehow she managed to pick herself up off the floor without stumbling back on her rump, although she did step on couple of the beer bottles that were strewn about the place. Yet another round of the awful noise was about to start when she opened the door. It took her a few seconds to see through her reddened eyes that it was Chad waiting there. "Oh. Heeeeey. What are you doing here?" she asked followed by another mixed yawn-groan.

Unlike his associate, Chad looked as he always did - completely composed and unfazed by anything. This being the case despite him drinking Evelyn and Jackie under the table the previous night. Evelyn gave up a _long_ time ago trying to figure out how he was able to do it. He slid past Evie and walked inside. "Lester's meeting us today. Figured I'd drop by early to make sure you're not…. _this_ ….when he shows up. Plus there's no telling if our new masters will drag us to the office."

"If they bring me in it will be kicking and screaming." Evie paused to put a hand to hear head. "Actually, screaming might not be the best idea. Owww." She closed the door and followed Chad to the kitchen where he was starting to go through her fridge. "Umm, what are you looking for?"

"That sports drink I left in here the other day. I've told you at least a hundred times to drink it before you party so you can avoid the nasty hangovers." Chad responded. After a few seconds of rummaging he gave up the search and switched over to her cabinet doors.

Evie started looking around at the mess around her. Going through the pile of bottles and pizza boxes she found the lime green bottle. Picking it up she gave it a good sniff. Just like herself it reeked of alcohol. Or maybe she was simply smelling herself. Now was not the time to debate odor sources in her head. Of that she was most definitely sure of. "Something tells me it wasn't going to work." She nervously chuckled but Chad just seemed to let it pass without a second thought. Hardly something he wasn't used to by now.

He fired up the coffee maker and finally settled his full attention back on her. He didn't think of her as being the worst case of post-party pain but she looked pretty bad. Her long red hair, which was usually flowing down her shoulders, was matted to one side of her head, somehow her lipstick was smeared even though there was no "action" at the party, and she was still wearing her heels despite having no pants.

Jackie suddenly burst through the door before Chad could open his mouth. In the complete opposite of the previous day she was dressed pretty light in just a white tank-top with a bright yellow bikini top underneath, baby blue hot pants, and her white high tops. In her hands was a big white box. From the smell alone Evelyn was able to determine its contents-fresh donuts. Naturally the young woman was all smiles. As long as Evelyn had known Jackie she had never seen an end to her perkiness. "What's up, morning glory?"

Evelyn turned around to greet her other best friend and in doing so gave her an eyeful of the hot mess that Chad was still trying to sort out. "Geez, Evie. You look like you crawled out of the dumpster behind Ace Liquor." Jackie waved her hand in front of her face. "Smell like it, too."

Evie once more smiled nervously. "What can I say? I was happy to get back to work and wanted to celebrate…..A lot." She started to reach for the box of donuts but Jackie pulled it away.

The beach bum-looking thief wagged her finger in a disapproving manner. "If you wanna party like the college kids then you gotta learn to handle your liquor. And certainly no donuts till you get a shower. Don't need our delicious baked treats reeking of booze like the rest of the place. We need to preserve all of the amazing flavor in order to savor these sweet treats as much as possible."

"They came from a convenience store down the street." Evelyn retorted.

"It doesn't matter. You. Shower. Now." Chad finally interrupted, taking a moment to grab a donut for himself. "Coffee's brewing and should be ready by the time you get out. With a little work we can get this pig sty cleaned up."

"Okay, okay. I'm going. But you better save some donuts for me." Evelyn whined a little as she took off for the shower, closing the bedroom door behind her. Chad and Jackie stood at the foot of the mess before them. How could one night with just three people produce so much trash? It shouldn't be possible. Should it?

"Guess we should get started, eh?" Jackie asked quite jokingly.

Chad's face didn't change emotions one bit when he responded. "I'm still trying to figure out her pants and shoes. It just doesn't seem scientifically possible."

Jackie nearly cracked up at his statement. "Don't worry, big guy." She patted him on the chest. "It's like figuring out how to take a bra off in one _smooooth_ motion. You'll figure it out someday." A laugh broke out while she got a couple of trash bags and started to clean up with Chad doing the same shortly afterward, also with big grin on his face.

It was about 25 minutes later when Evelyn emerged from her bedroom refreshed and redressed. The loose-fitting button-up blouse and pleated miniskirt she wore matched the casual style her friends had taken for their day off. The redhead's jaw dropped when she how spotless her living room now was. Chad was tying up the big black trash bags when she stepped into what had just been a dump moments ago. "Wow," was all she could get out before getting a very good look at the place. "You guys are miracle workers. I think I owe you two big time on this one." She grabbed Chad's sunglasses off his face and put them on followed by placing her bottom comfortably on the sofa.

Jackie came over with a tray of donuts and a cup of coffee for Evie. "You sure do. I'm thinking convertible ride around the north coast later. Maybe a stop by the beach to top it off."

"I second that." Chad piped in after tossing the trash down the garbage chute.

"Looks like the vote is unanimous. Casual beach trip it is." Evie said with a huge smirk on her face.

 _KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!_

The door again. No doubt it was the man they'd all been waiting for. Since Chad was the closest he decided to answer, but their guest didn't wait for him to open the door completely before shambling into the apartment. In walked the familiar hunched, sometimes hyperventilating, short figure of Lester. Instead of going to the Heist Room like usual to use Evie's' computers he brought his own laptop which he placed on the coffee table. "Morning, Lester. I hope you have something good for me." Evelyn joked before continuing to eat her donut.

Lester was not amused, however. "Oh I found plenty and if you knew what kind of people you were working for you wouldn't be so jovial about your current situation." Gently he sat down in the chair across from the two ladies and got to work on his computer. Several classified FIB documents popped up along with a profile of their new friend, Agent Daniels. When he spun the device around for Evie and Jackie to get a look they noticed right away that parts of it were blacked out. "Your good friend is quite an interesting case by FIB standards. No hero of a drug war or an overblown ego they can put on TV. Daniels rose through the ranks of the FIB going from a simple undercover agent on some op five years ago to the lead interrogator of the Bureau's West Coast Branch."

Jackie was the first to tear her eyes away from the computer screen. "Five years? That has to be some kind of record or something."

"From undercover agent to lead interrogator? What kind of op was this exactly? Did she catch some international drug lord?" Chad asked.

Lester adjusted his glasses slightly. "My best guess, which is _always_ the best guess, is that any details about that would be on the FIB's most restricted servers. I can't access that without plugging into them directly. Whatever it was must have been something big."

"Big enough to cover up by any means necessary even if it means bribing someone to keep quiet." Evelyn added.

"Well couldn't we just pull an undercover job and break into the FIB's offices?" Jackie asked, while looking inquisitively at the master hacker.

"You could if they weren't expecting it. Unfortunately some associates of mine already pulled that trick." Lester got up from his seat and found his way to the kitchen where he helped himself to a bottle of water.

 _I suppose now we know how that fire at the FIB building started._ Evelyn thought to herself. "No doubt they've tightened up security since then. Not that it matters anyway. They would recognize us immediately."

Chad, the main man of silence, finally spoke up. "I say we needn't worry about what's in Agent Daniels' past. What I get from this is that she's a woman with a lot of skills and a _very good_ poker face."

Lester nodded. "And if you screw it up you can guarantee they won't bribe you to keep quiet about it."

"Even if we don't there's no guarantee we'll walk away from this. As you said, quiet by any means necessary." Evelyn added. "So how do we go about getting this better hand?"

Lester finished the small water and tossed it into the empty trash can even though it didn't have a bag in it. "Leave that to me. I'll come up with something as soon as I can. In the meantime you need to keep being their obedient lapdogs." He closed up the laptop and headed for the door. "Just don't do anything to give them even more of an inch against you so NO WANTON DESTRUCTION. I'll call you when I have something and remember, you still owe me after this." At last he left without giving the crew any time to respond.

"So it's all up to Lester? I still don't find that very reassuring." said Chad, clearly worried about their slim chance of survival becoming even slimmer.

"Not necessarily." added Jackie.

"You got an idea?" asked Evelyn who was a little stunned. Jackie wasn't usually known for being quick with ideas but she did have her little moments every now and then.

"Well I was thinking about this a bit last night when I got home. Agent Daniels only contacts us through you, as if she thinks of you as our leader or something. If you're going to be the one she spends the most time with then maybe you can use that to our advantage." Jackie started.

Chad smiled and nodded. "Yeah. I get you. Try to get in her head. It will make her priorities all screwed up. What comes first? The mission or her new friends?"

Evelyn sighed. "I don't know, guys. You're asking a somewhat successful amateur criminal to play mindgames with someone who is specifically trained to do the same thing. I'm not sure it will work."

Jackie put on her signature smile and grabbed Evelyn's hand. "Don't worry, Evie. You've done your best so far and you've never failed us. This is bound to work."

"Couldn't have said it better myself, and if seeing that poster girl of positivity doesn't convince you then just remember: if it doesn't work we will most likely wind up eating lead salads and resting for all eternity in the LS River." Chad half-mockingly joked.

The redhead shook her head from thinking about how much this would probably fail, but she still gave her friends a smile. "Alright. I'll do it. Still not sure if this will work but I'll do my best." She turned to Chad with a few select words ready to let loose. "Oh and the only way I plan on going into the LS River is in my bikini, so speak for yourself." She stuck her tongue out at him and started to laugh.

"Whoo-hoo!" Jackie shot to her feet still having Evelyn by the hand. "Speaking of bikinis, let's get to the beach already!" She started her friend out of the comfortable sofa to her feet.

Evelyn laughed some more and followed. "Whatever you say, boss."

Chad followed behind the both of them to the elevator. He was always the stoic most of the time. In this instance however, he had a grin on his face the size of the whole state. They just might get through this alive afterall. For now, though, it was time for fun and frolicking under the hot sun.


	6. Who Do You Trust?

There was no late morning start for Agent Karen Daniels. There were never any in her six year long career. Not like those lackadaisical pinheads at the FIB who were taking days off while their building was undergoing repairs. The war for funding between her agency - the IAA - and the FIB also resulted in their building taking some damage, but a few windows were not going to stand in the way of her doing her job. Her spacious window office was on the same floor as the conference room where her interrogation of a critical suspect was suddenly interrupted by someone busting through the window and rescuing him. She barely managed to make it out with merely a graze to her arm. However her pride and reputation were heavily damaged. Since her big break working one of the biggest cases in the Agency's history back in Liberty City she was speedily climbing her way up the ladder. Now the Agency heads were out for blood following the disaster of the Tahir Javan case. As the lead interrogator when their suspect was lost it was Karen's head they were looking to place on the chopping block next.

She sat at her desk in her office typing away at her keyboard. Having her entire career riding on the success of a few common crooks was no excuse to miss filing reports. The previous night's operation didn't go as smoothly as expected but they could hardly argue with the results. An added bonus was that the plane crashing into the ocean managed to be a great way to dispose of evidence. The clattering of fingernails on keys was interrupted by her phone ringing. Without having to even ask who was on the other end she could tell it was her new boss. "Yes, sir?" she answered after picking up the receiver. "Be right in, sir." Quickly she set the phone receiver back on the hook and sighed a little. Time to see what her new idiot of a boss wanted.

Her office wasn't far from the aforementioned, bullet-ridden conference room. The walk to her supervisor's office took her right past it. The outside windows were still covered in boards while the windows next to the door were simply covered in tape along with the door itself. Her coworkers seemed to leave it unfixed to serve as a reminder of what got her into this mess even though she knew it was because they had not gotten around to ordering the replacement parts. As if she didn't have enough pressure on her shoulders to fix this mess. The office of the Director of West Coast Operations wasn't far away either. It was the largest office for a single person in the whole building. The name on the glass of the door had yet to be replaced and was simply whited out for the time being. Karen was still hoping to get her own name on that glass someday. She knocked on the door and was told to come in.

Inside and behind the desk was a young man around Karen's age. The nameplate on the desk read Damian Wilson. His black hair was very short and combed and like many other agents, he was clean shaven. To Karen he had the face of someone who was too eager to please his superiors without doing any actual hard work to get what he wanted. His features were completely unremarkable as well. She thought it would have made him a good fit for undercover work. Unfortunately it would require him to open his mouth. The job of Director would probably be hers right now if the schmuck hadn't lucked into breaking a very public case open and taking full credit for it.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" she asked as she shut the door behind her.

Wilson was writing on a document and barely looked up at her. "Have a seat, Daniels." Karen sat down in one of the open chairs across from him. "I wanted to discuss last night's operation a bit more in detail," he said in a voice that would make it clear to anyone that he had no presence in the field if he didn't try hard to sound authoritative.

"Everything is in the report, sir. I don't know what else I could say about it," Karen replied, now somewhat confused.

"I know what's in the report. What I'm interested in _isn't_." Wilson finished writing on the document and stuck it and a folder in his desk. "I want to know about these people after it was done. Did they look like they knew something different from what we've told them? Did they do anything suspicious? What was their demeanor like?"

Karen shook her head a little. "They didn't seem to do anything we didn't expect. We told them to do the job and, despite a hiccup, it was completed. Everything was well within normal operating parameters."

Wilson smiled as his voice became more lighthearted. "That's good. I'm glad to hear you say that."

Karen was still a little confused. Why was she called to the Director's office for such simple questions? They could have easily been answered over the phone. "Is there a problem I'm not aware of, sir?"

"We thought there might have been. Thanks to our revamped IT department we briefly picked up a hack into our system last night," he responded.

Karen wanted to laugh when he mentioned his IT department, though she groomed herself to hold back her real emotions. "Are you referring to your private contractors, sir?"

The director straightened up in his chair before speaking. "I am. Like your new friends they present new skillsets not readily available in the Agency. What better way to fight these assholes than with better assholes with the best technology money can buy? Besides, unlike some people around here, when they fail we can simply get rid of them." He chuckled to his own jokes like some clown.

Agent Daniels wasn't so pleased. It was no secret that some of her peers wanted her gone as a sacrificial lion to Langley. Partially to secure their own jobs and partially out of spite. The only difference between Wilson and her other colleagues was that Karen couldn't openly fire back in her own defense. "Will that be all, Director?" she snapped back, a smile masking the tranquil fury buried within.

Wilson picked up his phone, pressed a few buttons on the touch screen, and then sat it back down on his desk. "I've sent you some files detailing the next job. Meet with the lowlifes ASAP and get them on it." Karen nodded and got up to walk to the door. Wilson piped up before she could open the door. "Oh and Daniels," he paused for her to turn back around, "if you screw this up don't think I'll hesitate for a second to throw your sweet looking ass to the wolves." Another pause as Karen did her best to keep her true feelings hidden. "Well what are you waiting for? Go!"

Karen hurriedly shuffled through the door. If she didn't have a career to get back on track she would happily toss Wilson through the window. Shooting something usually helped with that, too. However, for now she had a job to do. She pulled out her phone and dialed Evelyn's number. "Ms. Collins, you and I need to meet. Alone. Don't worry. You can leave the guns behind for this one. The beach, hmm? I'll be sure to dress appropriately. See you then." It would be a good drive out there but at least it would give her time to blow off steam and get out of her suit for a while.

One hour later at around four in the afternoon Karen found herself on the beach for a second time that day. Instead of her suit she now wore a white tank top, jeans, and tennis shoes. She parked her black Buffalo in the parking lot and walked down to the sand where Evelyn and her friends were playing in the water. Evelyn came out of the sea as soon as she noticed Karen coming towards them.

"You were on a beach when we first talked, crash landed a plane next to a beach, and now spending a day off on one. I'm starting to think you're really a mermaid hiding amongst us humans." Karen joked as she handed Evelyn her towel and sunglasses.

The professional thief took them from the agent, placing the sunglasses on her face and beginning to pat herself down with the towel. "Really wasn't my choice this time. Outvoted. Plus I'm pretty sure the stories never mentioned mermaids carrying automatics." The two chuckled before Evelyn got straight to the point of their meeting on what was meant to be a day off. "So cut to the chase, Agent-" Evelyn caught herself before finishing, "Karen. Please get to the point of this meeting, Karen."

Finally on a first name basis. This was good news for Karen. Maybe she was already starting to trust her. "It's just your next job. Nothing serious. Just the two of us infiltrating the party of a somewhat famous person in Los Santos." She pulled out her phone with all of the files pertaining to the job. With the press of a button they were all sent to Evelyn's phone so that she could go over them later on her own. "If all goes right there won't be a single fatality. No one will ever know we were there."

"So you want a thief to play spy?" asked Evelyn rather incredulously.

"Oh you'll still be stealing. It will just be stealing that doesn't draw attention to yourself. A far cry from drilling safety deposit boxes in the middle of the day." she added.

Well, she had Evelyn on that one and hey, a celebrity party meant some decent food and champagne. "I assume this has something to do with the big job you have in store for us?"

Karen nodded and put her phone away. "We'll be stealing from gubernatorial candidate Jock Cranley. There are some supporters of the Agency who would like some dirt on Cranley in order to sway the election a different direction. I just gave you your new cover identity. You keep him busy and I'll do the tech work."

"How the hell am I supposed to keep a politician busy? I don't know jack about politics," said Evelyn somewhat worriedly.

Karen's response was a bit of laughter at first. "He's a former stuntman and his name is _Jock_. I have a feeling he won't have politics on his list of conversational topics and if you have to, use your imagination." Her eyes not-so-subtly looked over Evelyn's exquisitely hot, bikini-clad body.

Evelyn caught what she meant immediately. She groaned at the thought of having to seduce that piece of trash even if it meant a paycheck. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that," she said in open disgust.

"You'll hear no argument from me. Besides, I prefer a quick job if possible." Karen started looking Evelyn over again only this time the agent's eyes lingered on her body for a few moments.

The redhead pulled down her sunglasses, feeling a little perplexed about why the government agent was seemingly checking her out. "If you're using _your_ imagination right now you should know that it'll cost you dinner first," Evelyn mused.

"Trust me, Evelyn. If I were going to ask you out I would do so already. I'm actually taking a mental note of your measurements for the dress you'll be wearing tomorrow night." Karen chose to smirk anyway. "Although you do make taking a shot at a date very tempting."

It was all too possible in Evelyn's mind that Karen was simply putting on a pleasant facade to keep her under thumb or to be easier to manipulate. She decided to go along with the agent and laughed. Plus, no matter how much she didn't want to admit it, the woman wasn't too bad looking herself. She shook the thought from her head in order to put herself back on track. "So we're really doing this. I take it we'll be appearing together as 'colleagues?" she inquired.

Karen also got back to business and nodded. "Yes. Which means I'll be stopping by your place first so we can arrive together. Make sure you drive one of those fancy cars you people buy but hardly ever drive. Might be good to make sure it has a few unexpected optional features just in case."

Evelyn grinned from ear-to-ear when she heard that. "I think I have just the thing for that."

"I thought you would," Karen added. "Well….I guess that's everything. Any questions?"

"Just one," Evelyn started, "do I at least get to carry a pistol for personal protection?"

"You'll get an SNS pistol. Should be small enough to carry in your handbag," answered Karen.

"Understood. I guess I'll see you tomorrow night then. Unless you want to stick around and hang out for a while." The others might not approve of the invitation but Evelyn thought it might help improve relations with their new associate.

The offer was tempting, nevertheless she had to turn it down. Business had to come first. The last time she got close with a mark it made things complicated. That would only jeopardize an already arduous situation. "I'm afraid not. I have to get things ready for tomorrow. Don't worry about the dress, by the way. I should have something that will fit you. See you then, Evelyn." She smiled once more and headed back to her car.

Evelyn watched her walk away. She wasn't sure why but she was starting to find the woman pretty fascinating. The way she seemed to have everything under control with an answer for everything was something Evelyn had never seen before. Maybe the blackmail with the threat of going to prison really was a last resort to get them working. Her thoughts were interrupted by Jackie yelling at her to come back and have some more fun.

In her car Karen took a moment to watch Evelyn go back to her friends. If they really were working with a hacker it would take a lot more work to build up the level of trust needed for them to say it to her. Then again with Damian Wilson sitting in his office and looking to take her out of the picture as soon as possible, she wanted to find a way to fight back against him if that's what it came down to. Now it was just a matter of who she trusted more. Either way she _had_ to succeed.


	7. You Know My Name

The day of the party left Evelyn antsy all day long. She'd barely slept the night before from the anticipation of such a big job. It wasn't the scope of the job that got to her so much as the need to be subtle about it. Her team knew how to use stealth when it was needed but this would be stealth blown up in scale by one thousand. It worried her so much that she didn't even drink the night before. She knew she shouldn't be so nervous. It wasn't as if she was doing the hard part of the job. All she had to do was talk while Karen spied her way around the place. What she needed right now was coffee. So what if it was her second pot today? It helped keep her on edge and alert. She'd probably be splashing water in her face if not for her makeup that she was in the midst of trying to apply with her slightly shaking hands.

 _What the hell am I doing? I'm a thief, not a damn secret agent. Whatever happened to the simple idea of solving your problems with a big gun and threats of violence? I hope Karen at least talks me through this._

She finished applying the last bit of pink blush to her cheeks and stepped out of her large bathroom. Her heart skipped a beat when she turned the corner and found Karen lounging on her large bed. "What the shit, Karen?! Ever heard of knocking?! I could have shot you." Evie raged as she put her hands on her hips.

As was typical for a high ranking secret agent Karen didn't lose her calm. "With what? Your hairdryer?" She chuckled with a smug smirk on her face. "Besides, I was curious." Karen got a little more relaxed on the bed and crossed her legs.

"Curious about what? If you can give me a damn heart attack?" she asked with a twang of anger left in her voice.

"Curious about you yourself, Evelyn. To see how someone with your particular hobbies manages to balance that with your personal style. You put on this image of a badass biker who drinks hard and drives muscle cars and yet you seem to have no qualms about living the high life." The agent made herself more comfortable by sipping a bottle of water.

"Just because I like to be practical in my job doesn't mean I can't live fancy if I want to," she retorted. "Now do you have the stuff we need for tonight? I'm ready to get this over with already."

Karen nodded, apparently satisfied with that answer. "I've got it all right here." She pointed at the clothing bag hung on the wall. "Hope you don't mind the color. I tried to find something suitable to your tastes."

Evie grabbed the bag by the hook. Furthermore she unzipped it to get a look at the surprise inside. She grinned in approval. "I can work with this. Just give me about an hour to get ready. I'd say make yourself at home but it looks like you already have." Evie mused as she walked into her closet to change. When she reemerged later she was wearing a silver sleeveless cocktail dress. A large sash attached to it wrapped around her waist ending in a large tail that looked as though it could have doubled as another skirt. The actual skirt portion only went a few inches down her legs. Evie could see Jackie wearing something like this but she herself felt far too exposed. Although she did have some very nice long legs to show off. That would serve her well in her role as distraction. At least it wasn't floor length so she would be able to run if she needed to. The necklace Karen picked out for her was also silver with an emerald pendant that would hang low down her neck.

"Wow. Look at you. You look ravishing." Karen stood up from the bed in order to get a better look at her. Slowly she circled around Evie taking in her beauty. "You should wear girls clothes more often," she teased.

"Yeah well, don't get used to it. This is a one time deal." Evie protested sounding just a tad bit annoyed.

"What a shame. Oh well. Time to move on, I suppose." Karen picked up another bag from beside the bed. She opened it to reveal a long blonde wig. "Put this on. Since you're not well trained in this craft it will give you some help in disguising yourself."

Evie proceeded to put the wig on. It was already styled into a hime-cut with bangs framing her face and the rest trailing down her shoulders and back. _Not bad. Maybe I should go blonde the next time I hit the salon._ She really couldn't help but smile a bit at how well she looked when she looked in the mirror. Hopefully Karen didn't catch her doing that. She probably wouldn't hear the end of it.

Now that she was standing Evie was able to also get a better look at Karen's ensemble. She wore a low cut, black Prada dress. It reached down to her knees and was ruffled with a bow on the back of the waist. A pair of black heels completed the look. What really caught Evie's eye was the bright gold necklace with five rubies the size of half dollars inlaid around it.

 _Oh yeah. I'm sure she was able to afford_ that _with a standard agent's salary._

The other thing she was able to notice thanks to this change of wardrobe was how alluring Karen was when not wearing a standard suit. She wasn't sure if it was the tightness of the low cut dress or her natural beauty, but Karen definitely had a body to be admired. It unequivocally made the thief wonder if Karen checked her out as much as she was doing to her right now, or if she would even consider such a thing. It didn't seem out of the realm of possibility given her job though spies were taught to hide everything about their real selves. Asking directly would most likely end in awkward silence and stares. She wasn't given much more time to think it over to herself since Karen started waving her hand in her face.

"Hey. You there?" she asked urgently.

Evie shook her head. "Yeah. Sorry. What were you saying?"

Karen laughed on the inside at how easily her partner was flustered. "I asked if you had a car ready. The party will be starting soon."

Evelyn brought her head back to the situation at hand. "Oh. Yeah. I mean, _oh yes_ ," she said smirking. "I've got just the one."

Five minutes later the duo exited the elevator of the high rise apartment leading straight to the garage. Evelyn flipped the lights on revealing the car they would use. It was parked in the first slot closest to the door. The metallic silver birch paint reflected the fluorescent light as did as the perfectly spotless windshield. The rear fins and classic styled mirrors showed that this car was vintage as well as chic. When Karen caught an eyeful of the vehicle she swore she could hear a familiar musical sting in the air. "Don't you find that just a little stereotypical?" she quipped.

The sarcastic remark was met with a beaming grin amid the two standing in front of the classic JB 700 sports car. "Hey. You ask an everyday person to play spy, you better be prepared for them to live up the part." She giggled as she walked around the car and opened to door for her guest. "I practically got this thing for a steal at auction."

"Why am I worried that you got it for an _actual_ steal?" Karen asked somewhat worriedly while walking around the car. Once she got in Evelyn shut the door and went around to the driver's seat.

"I'll have you know that I paid real money for this car. I had to spend my ill-gotten gains somehow. Now stop worrying. That's my job, remember?"

Karen buckled the small seat belt of the old sports car. "Who's worried? It was only a movie prop based on a car over fifty years old."

"Not a problem. Chad looked the whole thing over for me. The guns fire, the rear shield raises up, and, my personal favorite," she paused to lift up the center console which had a chilling bottle inside, "champagne cooler. Pretty nifty, eh?" Her eyebrows jumped up and down several times in excitement. "Isn't this car the coolest?"

"As long as it gets us there and back in one piece it is," Karen responded trying her best to be serious. There was a long pause as they waited for the car to warm up. No one said anything for several moments leading to an awkward silence in the vehicle. Finally Karen cleared her throat and said, "Yeah it's pretty nice."

"Knew it." Evelyn said in cheerful victory and then put the car in gear as the garage door opened.

Twenty minutes later they pulled up to the lavish mansion in Vinewood Hills. The cul-de-sac in the gated community for the richest of the rich in Los Santos was lined with cars. There appeared to be a whole team of security guards outside checking identification with some of them even sporting submachine guns in lieu of handguns. "Is it too late to turn around?" asked Evelyn with her hands gripping the steering wheel.

Karen chuckled. "Sorry. No going back now. Just relax. You're technically doing the easy part, remember?"

"I'm not really one to work without some kind of mask while in public and all I've got for defense is some dinky squirt gun in a trick bag. I am downing _so_ many martinis when we get in there. God knows I need _something_ for my nerves right now." Evelyn parked the car but they didn't get out just yet.

"Alright. First off, you only get two or three martinis **tops**. I need you sharp for this. Secondly, you are wearing a mask. You just don't realize it. You think we show so much skin for fun? It keeps the target's attention on everything _but_ our faces. Details are hard to recall when the only thing they can remember you by is how amazing your rack is. Just be cool. You got that?" Karen asked trying to reassure her inexperienced partner.

Evelyn took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled. One by one her hands let go of the wheel. "Yeah. I got it. It's just talking right?" Karen nodded. "I can do that. I mean, I robbed the biggest fucking bank in the city and got away with it. How hard could _this_ be?" She unbuckled her seat belt followed by Karen doing the same. Evie opened the glove box and produced a Vintage Pistol. As far as she was concerned if she was going to play spy then she might as well have some fun with it and complete the look. Karen shook her head in disappointment over her partner doing such a dorky thing but Evie didn't care that much. They each grabbed their respective handbag and exited the vehicle. Both of them stepped right in front of the car when Karen stopped Evelyn suddenly.

"Aren't you going to lock this car you're so proud of? Turn on an alarm or something?" she asked.

"You think someone is going to be stealing cars here of all places? Who'd be crazy enough to do that?" Evelyn asked in response.

"Hmm. Let me see. The same crazies who signed up for stealing jets off an aircraft carrier perhaps?" Karen quipped in return.

The sound of a car alarm turning on chimed. "Let's just go," said Evelyn who proceeded to walk towards the door, throwing her car keys in her handbag. Karen laughed just quietly enough so that Evelyn couldn't hear before catching up to her a moment later.

As expected a security guard in a black suit and tie stopped the pair at the door. "IDs please." Karen and Evelyn pulled their ID cards from their handbags. The large man took a second to look each of them over and then unexpectedly straightened up. "Deputy Director Fairchild. I wasn't aware we'd be expecting you."

There was a slight pause before Karen nudged Evie's elbow as a hint. The woman in disguise quickly piped up. "Oh yes. I wouldn't miss the party for the world. You know us at the FIB absolutely _love_ Jock." Evelyn was all laughs and smiles on the outside but felt extremely nauseous on the inside for forcing herself to say that.

"I'm sure Mr. Cranley will be very happy to hear that. I must apologize for not recognizing you sooner. If I had known you were coming I would have brought a better security team."

"Oh no. Security is fine as is. You're all doing a fine job. In fact, just act as if I'm not even here." Good thing they were too busy trying to sell their parts right now. Karen would absolutely cringe at that statement.

The security guard, who had made it pretty clear that he was also the security chief, laughed a little. "Yes Ma'am. Please, enjoy yourselves." He handed their IDs backed to them and motioned them to step through the door.

The ladies took their cards back and were all smiles as they stepped through the door. Once it closed and they were out of view of the doorman Evelyn immediately dropped the happy act and pulled Karen aside. "What the hell, Karen?" she wanted to scream furiously but had to settle on whispering instead. "Deputy Director of the fucking FIB? I know jack shit about the FIB! And here's a thought. Isn't that someone they would actually check in some sort of database? We're not gonna be here long once they realize I'm not actually her."

"They will check it. It's standard protocol for a soiree like this. Fortunately we've been upgrading our IT department at the Agency. When they check records they'll see your picture instead of hers. For tonight you _are_ Deputy Director Moira Fairchild. So stay calm and just play the part." Karen took Evelyn by both hands. "You've got this," she said in a very reassuring tone.

Evelyn took another deep breath and nodded. "Alright. Let's do this." Karen smiled in agreement. She then latched her hands to Evelyn's arm to sell the part further. "So how did you get a picture of me wearing this wig anyway?"

"Two little things called your mugshot and a computer. Wonders of the 21st Century." Karen joked.

The living room where the party was being held was absolutely huge. Lanterns hung from the ceiling for ambient lighting and an array of laser lighting shone against the north wall. Any furniture that would normally be in the room was missing. In its place were several small tables with chairs grouped together in front of a stage and podium, no doubt for the man of the hour to give a speech. On either side of the room were a set of stairs leading to a second floor that snaked around and met on the north side of the house. A few of the guests were standing on the second floor but the majority of them were in the main party area. Evelyn didn't recognize any of the other guests though that was hardly a surprise to her. The only reason she knew who Cranley was is because of his movies and public appearances.

The pair made their way through the crowd until they spotted the pinhead that was their target. Not that it was hard for them to do. Jock Cranley had a face that everyone wanted to punch at some point. Not only that, but it appeared as though it _had_ been punched by everyone in San Andreas. It didn't help that he was one of the victims of several botched attempts at plastic surgery trying to make himself look younger. Both women heavily despised the bloke. Evie because the man was a complete moron and Karen because he was all but proven to be guilty of killing his wife fifteen years ago. He formed a circle of conversation with two older men in tuxedos who looked to be far more important than him. They broke up their little circle when the ladies approached.

"What do we have here? More escorts? Normally I would accept but I'm afraid I'm already swamped with them. Any of you fellas need 'em?" Yup. Now Evelyn definitely wanted to pull her gun out and blast him in the face. If only there weren't so many security guards around.

The gentleman to his left spoke up. "You don't know who this is, Jock? This is Moira Fairchild, Deputy Director of the FIB."

Jock was quick to laugh off his blunder of course. Bless his heart. He tried so hard to appear witty and smart but always failed. Karen felt it really added to his "charm" of being nothing more than a buffoon who should have been in an on-set accident years ago. "Of course I know. I was just kidding. Moira - may I call you Moira? Moira here is way too prudish looking to be an escort. A real fun killer if you know what I mean."

Evelyn and Karen played along by laughing at his "jokes." "Well, Jock, I suppose we can't all be as stoic as you are." One of the two men in the group laughed a little at Evelyn's retort. Apparently he got it though Jock looked confused as he downed his glass of champagne.

The guest who laughed was old enough in appearance to be Evelyn's father. Bald, tortoiseshell eyeglasses, and spoke with a refined dialect. "I must admit, Deputy Director…"

"Oh. Please, just call me Moira." Evelyn interrupted while snagging a martini from a passing waiter. Before she could drink it Karen took it from her hand and then downed it herself. _Spoil sport._

"Moira. I have to admit that I was surprised to hear of your arrival. My office was told that you'd be on sabbatical for at least a month. Even more surprising is that you did not arrive with your husband. I was sure he would be with you. And you are…." He switched his view from Evelyn to Karen now. His free hand extended for a proper greeting.

"Sarah. Sarah Fawcett. I'm Mrs. Fairchild's secretary. A real honor to meet you both." She took the man's hand who proceeded to give it a light kiss.

"To be completely honest with you; my husband has no idea I'm actually here. Sarah and I aren't exactly _'strictly business_ ' in our relationship, if you know what I'm sayin'." Evelyn leaned down and kissed Karen on the cheek in a bid to be more convincing, although Karen didn't look phased by the action at all. Instead she clamped her hands around Evelyn's arm and started to rub it affectionately.

"Well, I can't say I'm surprised. Roland must have at least five mistresses so, in my eyes at least, I would say this makes you even," he said with a smile.

 _If only I'd thought to bring my recorder._ Karen thought upon hearing what could be an intelligence goldmine.

"If you'll excuse me, ladies. I have other business to tend to," he said and then turned to Cranley. "Jock." With that he moved on to another group of guests huddled in a corner leaving just the three of them. Evelyn was a little sad to lose someone who sounded quite sensible and would now even sooner have to be alone with the creep.

"If you ask me I think it's great to see two beautiful women showing so much love for one another. Now if you were two guys I'd be like, 'Whoa! Stop grossing me out!" He stopped to laugh at his own material yet again. Evelyn was quite annoyed but laughed as well to keep her cover.

"You know, Jock. The FIB is looking forward to your election. We feel that we can operate more freely with someone who is just as concerned with security as we are. I mean, are we really going to trust some rich cow who thinks she's better than everyone else just because she can throw big words around like 'pontificate' or 'addlebrain?" Evelyn said as she grabbed another drink, this time making sure it was out of reach of her handler.

"Ain't that the truth! Security for this state is at the top of my list of priorities. For too many years now we've let the gangs and cartels run these streets. We can't even trust the police anymore after so many cases of crooked cops. Who's to blame for all this? The liberal ninnies! With my election as governor I'll use tactics that make sure we'll never be surprised by a threat. Looser guidelines to allow martial law, walls built around the entirety of the state which have the added benefit of stimulating our stilted economy, and live camera feeds in every business, home, school, and bathroom stall straight to my office in the Governor's Mansion," he said with such pride as if he were giving a public speech.

"And that right there is what we're looking for. The guts to show tough love against those hippies we call kids today." Evelyn sipped her drink until her glass was empty. "You know, Jock. I love this main room but it's just so hard to concentrate on business with all the noise." Evelyn stepped closer to the dippy man in front of her. Going for sultry now she locked eyes with him, the olive from her martini glass in hand. "What do you say we take this discussion somewhere a bit more _private_? I'm sure we can work out some kind of terms. You do something for me and we do something for you." On cue she popped the olive into her mouth and sucked out the soft core before slowly eating it. For added effect she moaned lightly. It may not have been much but Jock struck Evelyn as the type of man who didn't need much work at all to be seduced. Finally she went against better judgement and brushed up against him, placing one hand on his chest. "What do you say, _Governor_ Cranley?"

Cranley downed his beverage in one quick gulp. "Of course I can do that. Why don't we go to my study. I never use it but my campaign manager said I should have one. Right this way, ladies."

It was but a brisk walk to Cranley's private study. It was exactly as he'd said. Like it had never had a foot step in it since the day it was furnished. There was a brown leather sofa with a coffee table and a couple of chairs in the center of the room and an unlit fireplace on the far wall. Karen guessed that it was electric as there was no chimney sticking out of the roof on this side of the house. The walls were lined with various movie posters that he had been in, but rarely was the main star of the picture. After the ladies walked in he was sure to shut the heavy door behind them. It was made of solid steel from the sound of it hitting against the wooden doorframe.

"Make yourselves comfortable, ladies." Evie and Karen sat down on the sofa as Cranley walked to one of the faux wooden panels that made up the walls of the room. It opened to reveal a mini fridge stocked with liquors of various brands. While his back was turned Evie turned to Karen who was shaking her head. A clear sign that she should avoid any drinks from here on out. Evie nodded just in time before Jock shut the door and returned with drinks..

As if on a cue Evie didn't know about, Karen's phone started to ring inside her handbag. "Oh no. It's my boyfriend," Karen said unenthusiastically. "He thinks I'm at my mother's tonight. Is there somewhere I could take this?"

"Sorry, babe. The only place not off limits tonight is the bathroom. I can have one of my boys show you if you want," he said.

"That won't be necessary, Mr. Cranley. I'm sure it's the only door in the whole house without a scary man standing next to it." Karen said as she stood back up. "Try not to have too much fun without me, darling." Her hand reached down to Evie's head. As she felt Karen's hand tenderly stroke the fake hair of the wig Evie could feel her hand slip something comfortably into her ear. Finally she left the room altogether leaving Evie completely alone with Jock.

With Karen finally gone Jock decided to make his move. It didn't take any time at all for him to fill the space left vacant beside Evie on the sofa. "Now we can get down to business," he said way too enthusiastically for Evie's liking.

A second later Karen's voice was piping into her ear. "Alright, Evelyn. I'm on my way to his office. Just do as we planned. Keep him busy and no one will ever know we were here. This shouldn't take long at all." Her calm voice was a big help to the thief who was doing her best to stay in her role. She tapped her ear twice as confirmation of Karen's instructions.

The actual spy on the job ducked into the bathroom as she said she would. There she noticed a medium sized window on the wall. Opening it showed her a twenty foot drop straight down with just enough of a ledge for her to stand on. In her handbag was a belt with a clasp with which to attach the bag of tricks. With no time to waste she put it on right away. Here's where a loose-fitting skirt was a blessing. It easily allowed her to climb through the window, though she wasn't able to close it behind her as it was serving as her handrail. A single guard armed with a submachine gun patrolled the garden below. As long as she didn't give him a reason to look up she would be fine. Fortunately the roof of the mansion was still a full wall above her giving her something to lean back on without fear of falling off.

Inch by careful inch she shimmied towards the balcony that was at least thirty feet away. Part of the wall was obscured by a tall tree that she could use for a little bit of cover. She'd just gotten behind it when she heard the sentry below her radio in.

"Control. We've got an open window. Second floor bathroom. Probably some pothead again. You sure you want to ignore? Roger that. Continuing patrol. Out" After his check in about the window he continued on his designated path followed by Karen continuing on hers.

When she was finally close enough she leaped over the stone railing of the balcony, her heels tapping on the hard marble as she landed. On instinct she crouched down as she made her way to the all-glass door separating her from the office. Through it she could see that it was completely unoccupied, yet she could bet her life that there were more heavily armed guards on the other side of the room's door. Just on the off chance that Cranley was a _total_ moron Karen gave the door handle a good jiggle to see if it was locked. To her complete surprise it was. A quick sweep with the special function of her phone informed her that the room was free of tripwires and bugs as well.

 _Guess he doesn't think anyone would try anything while he was home. You guessed wrong, pal._

The lock on the outside door was so simple that any child could figure out how to pick it. With a trained agent like her around the man might as well have left it completely open anyway. Once done she slipped inside without a single sound. "I'm in, Evelyn," she whispered over the comm unit in her ear. "I'll let you know when I'm done. Out."

Things weren't going so smoothly for poor Evelyn. The door to the hall wasn't locked yet she felt trapped. Suddenly robbing the Pacific Standard sounded like a cake walk in how easy it made her feel in comparison and even if Karen hadn't told her directly not to drink the swill Cranley handed her she wouldn't touch the stuff out of fear of being date raped. She'd heard Cranley's ads on the radio and seen his commercials. It didn't take meeting him up-close to convince her that he was some creep not to be trusted.

"What's the matter, Moira?" Cranley asked. "You haven't touched a drop of your drink."

"Sorry, Jock," Evelyn said bringing her mind back to the task at hand. "I guess I'm just a little shy. You know how it is being around new people. Especially when alone with such a big celebrity like you."

He scooted a little closer to her. "No need to worry, sweetheart. You'll find that I'm very easy to get comfortable around." A hand on her leg was enough to get Evie to bolt from the sofa causing Jock to fall over into the cushions after a failed attempt at leaning in for a kiss.

The amateur spy placed herself atop the end of Jock's practically brand new desk with her legs crossed. She was starting to think that she used a bit too much charm to get this pig's attention. "Before we get to the _real_ fun we have a business matter to settle. Plans for the funding, the coordinating of FIB forces, and contracts to draw up." She figured that would slow him down a bit.

The putz was quick to join her at the desk and, as expected, was way inside her personal comfort zone. "What's the hurry? This is a party after all. Don't you think we can have some fun and enjoy ourselves without work getting in the way?" he whined.

Evie wagged her finger directly in his face. "Now, Jock. We're talking about the security of an entire state. The FIB takes its job very seriously. You think our problems are bad now? Just think of how much worse it would be if we took more time for fun instead of work. As a candidate in the race for Governor I'd expected you to take it just as seriously."

Jock loudly groaned and backed off a bit. Evie took great joy in seeing this sleazeball suffer. Perhaps the night might be somewhat nice afterall. "That's what advisers and department supervisors are for. What's the point in having them if _I_ have to do the majority of the work?"

"If you're saying you can't commit then I'm afraid a relationship between our respective offices just isn't possible." She took some inspiration from the movie posters hanging around her to play up her act. "If there's no relationship between our offices then a relationship between our bodies wouldn't work out, either," she said turning her head away from Jock in a similar manner to a drama queen.

"Come on now, baby. I can work with you. I just need a little incentive to get the work done is all." He sat down on the desk next to her. "Give me a chance to show you what I can do with the proper motivation." Evie could feel his hand on her back now. It slowly started its way down and stopped on her rear which he gave a good squeeze.

Evie wanted more than anything else to put an end to her misery right there. The door was closed and her gun had a silencer. It wasn't as if anyone would notice right away. Then again, it wasn't worth it to hear Karen gripe about how she didn't follow the mission. In place of that idea she actually thought about what Karen would do in this situation. She would keep her cool and continue to play the part. If that's what Karen would do then that is exactly what she would do.

"I'm sorry, Jock. This just isn't going to work out. Perhaps the FIB should consider someone else to back in this election like Sue Murry." She hopped off the desk and collected her bag from the table. "Now if you'll excuse me. I should go collect Sarah and be on my way. I'll let my office know that you just aren't interested."

Cranley grew irate at that sentiment. "Sue Murry?! That bitch wouldn't know security if it came and hit her in the face. She thinks that keeping the same crooked cops out there is enough to keep the little people safe. You know how _I_ think. Glass houses sink ships and all that junk." He walked closer and closer which forced Evie to back up until she had her back against the wall. "You just stick with ole Jock and everything will work out A-ok for everyone." His hand crept slowly up Evie's stomach with his other arm forming a barricade on the other side.

That was enough for Evie to decide that enough was enough. She played things Karen's way and now it was time for her way. She opened her handbag to go for the hidden gun inside, the creep's head coming closer the whole time for a kiss. "I think I've given you the wrong impression, Jock," she whispered.

"Not at all. You've told me what you want and now I'm gonna give it to you," he said sounding quite breathy himself. He planted small kisses on her cheek and then started going down her neck.

That was when she finally felt it. The hand of this pervert groping her breast. Evie's body acted on instinct, giving a hard knee to his stomach. Cranley groaned and stumbled backwards. The force of the blow was enough to make him lose his balance as well. The sight of him on the floor in pain made Evie smile as she whipped out her small pistol and aimed it at him. "I'm sorry, Jock, but what I want most of all is to see you exactly like this - in your place and suffering."

The man struggled to get up at first. It was pretty clear that despite his public appearance as a strong man of action the years of physicality had taken their toll on him. How Evie wished she could get a picture of this moment. She'd have it framed and hung in her living room. "L-look, Moira. I'm into some kinky stuff but this is new even for me." His hand clutched his chest while the other grabbed the table for balance.

"Listen up, you imbecile. In case you haven't noticed this is a _real_ gun, not some toy like in one of your reprehensible movies," said the thief as she attached the silencer to the end of her pistol.

"Why do you keep using these big words I don't understand? Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to keep up?" he whined.

"Aww. Do my big words make your head hurt?" she asked in a sarcastically, over-the-top nurturing voice. "Good, because your terrible line delivery and constantly missed cues make **my** head hurt. Do you have any idea how many movies you've ruined that would have been great with someone else in the role? If you ask me, _that's_ a greater injustice against this world than this farce of a campaign you got going here."

"That's why you're here? You don't like my movies?" His annoying question was answered by a swift backhanded slap across the face.

"Just shut the **fuck up** already." Evelyn growled as she delightfully watched Cranley rub his cheek in agony. Her eyes glanced over to the still full glass of alcohol sitting on the table next to him and then an idea hit her like a thunderball. "You look mighty parched, Mr. Cranley. Why don't you have yourself a drink to calm those nerves?"

"No thanks. I'm quite alright," he groaned.

"No, really…" Evelyn stuck the tip of the gun barrel against the temple of Jock's forehead. "I insist." He reluctantly took the glass in his hand and drew it closer to his face. It was ostensibly all coming back to him now. The way he didn't want that particular glass told her everything she suspected earlier was true. He stopped just short of having it touch his lips. "Go on," she ordered.

Little by little he tipped the glass up while Evie watched intensly. The amber liquid was just about to pass across his lips when he tossed the glass away and charged forward, spearing Evie hard against the wall. She grunted loudly from the surprise attack and harsh slamming of her midsection. She tried to hit him with the gun in her hand but another pressing hit against the wall forced it to slip out of her hand. Every poster frame hanging on the wall shook violently with each new hit. Evie was busy cursing herself for allowing herself to get too comfortable in the situation.

Her attacker backed off long enough for her to fall down in pain. She hunched over trying to catch her breath while she had the chance. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him rearing up for a second assault and evaded his punch by moving her head back a bit. The fist missed her by a few centimeters followed by another that she barely avoided. The man seemed to be versed in a brawling style. Too reliant on hard punches which left him open when he missed. The man may have been a Vinewood stuntman but Evelyn had years of street fighting on her side. After another failed punch she took her opening for a counterattack. Low dodge with a shot right to the ribs starting a sequence combined with an uppercut to the chin and ending with a jumping roundhouse kick to his chest. The flurry of blows was hard enough to send him crashing through one of the leather chairs in the center of the room. To make things a little easier Evie pulled up her skirt a little. It was less for fanservice and more to allow her greater movement for fighting.

Using the opportunity presented to her when he finally got back up out of the mess of stuffing and leather, Evelyn ran up to him, leaped into the air whilst grabbing him by the neck, and let gravity carry them both down through the coffee table, though Jock would feel the majority of the attack. The solid wood construction fell apart instantly leaving a nice crater of destruction. Cranley groaned loudly in pain. Evelyn wasn't feeling the hottest either but she at least had her opponent suck up most of the fall damage for her. By the time she got back to her feet Jock managed to grab one of the broken table legs and proceeded to smack her square in the face with it, knocking her back down again.

Jock struggled back to his feet. Instead of pressing on the attack he took a moment to step over to the electric fireplace and switch it on. The machine crackled to life. A second later he was back at Evie's side. It was a little painful for him but he still found a way to pick her up and toss her headfirst into the device. She screamed out in pain as the glass of the fireplace covering shattered against her back. The heat made sure she would feel more than the simple pain of glass cutting her skin. Some blood coughed up from Evelyn's mouth as the former Vinewood star took the time to pick up her dropped gun.

Evie got to her hands and knees in time to be greeted with the barrel of the gun straight between her eyes. Jock used the gun to motion for her to get up. It wasn't an easy feat to get back on her feet with both arms raised. It didn't help that she could feel shards of glass trying to dig into her bare feet. "You're pretty spry for some old geezer. You must take a lot of vitamins."

"I'm like a locomotive, sweetheart. Slow to start but once i get going I stop for nobody." Evie couldn't stop herself from laughing. "What the hell is so funny?" he asked now going from assured to agitated.

"Oh, I was just thinking about how that's the perfect simile to your campaign. Needs stoking to get anywhere, can be easily derailed by the smallest problem, and there's nothing quite as spectacular as watching it wreck."

"You think you're so fuckin' funny. Tell me why _I'm_ the one holding the gun if you're so smart."

"Just got lucky that way? Hey man, I give you props for even knowing how to hold one. To get real here for a second; I honestly started assuming you let all the stunt doubles take over while you hit up the buffet."

"That's a damn lie and you know it! I do **all** of my own stunts! My team can back that up every time!" Evie could see small tears starting to form in his eyes as his voice got shaky like he was ready to start sobbing. "Welp, it's not going to matter anyway since you won't be around to see them anymore." He straightened up a bit before cocking the pistol's hammer.

"Yeah well there's just one thing you're forgetting. What the hell is that?!" she screamed pointing a finger in the air beside him. When the idiot actually fell for one of the oldest tricks in the book and turned his head she used his moment of confusion to her advantage. She once again nailed him with a kick to the gut, grabbed him by the head, twisted around so that they were facing the same direction, and finally dropped down through the air; his jaw hitting violently on Evelyn's shoulder. The direct result of the attack being that Jock was now lying on his back with so much head trauma that he was knocked unconscious.

The study was a complete disaster now. What had been a very nice room to work in now looked like a couple of professional wrestlers used it for a street match. She made sure to grab her gun and toss it in her bag as she rose to her feet with a couple of seconds spent to fix her dress again. She'd have kicked the lecherous asshole again for good measure if it wouldn't hurt so much. She opened the door to find two security men standing outside the room. "Sorry about the disruption, boys. Mr. Cranley and I are such hard negotiators that we just couldn't work out a deal." She slipped past the security detail and rushed down the hall and around the corner when they peeked into the room. Karen stepped out of the bathroom just as she was walking by it. "Did you get it?" she asked in a rush.

"Yeah. What's going on?" Karen asked very concerned. Evie grabbed her by the arm without bothering to stop.

"I'll explain later. We gotta go **now**." Evie replied. Karen feared for the proper explanation. The two headed downstairs to the main hall which was still filled with partygoers. It seemed to Evie that the noise of the party had drowned out the ruckus upstairs. _That should make things easier._ Of course, right as the duo made it outside to the car they could see the security team outside beginning to mobilize.

"Stop that car!" shouted the security chief. As ordered, ten of the security men took aim and fired directly at them. Quite fortunate for the pair of spies that Evie had replaced the armor of the car that also extended to bulletproof glass. Bullets hit the car all over as Evie struggled a bit to put the car in gear.

"Whenever you're ready, Deputy Director," said Karen nonchalantly.

"Not helping, **secretary** ," she snarled in return. Immediately upon the old car deciding to cooperate at last she threw it in reverse and flew through the closed iron gate. The chunks of metal from both the gate and the car crashed onto the pavement with very loud clangs. From what Karen could tell it was the rear bumper.

"I do hope you have a decent escape route planned." Karen stated, still in an extremely calm voice as though they were going on a Sunday drive and not, in fact, away from trained killers who were about to give chase.

The car drifted slightly around curves of the mountainside road. Things worked out for them a bit since it was so late meaning most of the roads would be nearly deserted. "Don't forget that I used to cross these roads almost everyday in my old life." They didn't make it far before three sets of headlights appeared in the rear view mirror.

"What'd you do to piss these guys off anyway?" Karen asked.

"Got in a brawl with Cranley," answered Evie already wincing in anticipation of Karen's expected reaction to her "methods."

"How did you manage that? I set it all up for you perfectly. All you had to do was talk to the guy!" And now the bullets were back. They hit the rear panelling of the car in loud percussion as Evie continued down the winding road.

"Hey! I tried it your way! Considering the last guy who got a feel of my chest without asking is six feet under now and missing both hands, I'd say that my reaction was very light in comparison." At her first chance she turned off from Vinewood Hills and headed north between the mountains connecting Los Santos with Blaine County. Sadly all three of the pursuing vehicles managed to make the sharp turn as well although one of them took a street sign as a casualty.

"Low profile! Do you not know the meaning of the words ' **low profile?!** " The car slid around another curve in a perfectly executed high speed turn. If they missed any turn at all it would mean careening down the 50+ foot drops to certain death. "Doesn't this car have spikes that fall out the back or something?" Karen added.

"It was the one thing we couldn't get working again. Closest thing we got is under your seat." Evie answered.

Karen reached down underneath the seat and pulled out a small case. Inside was a stack of small discs which she recognized as mines. "That'll do," she said smiling. She was getting ready to let one drop when the car hit a bump in the road causing her to accidentally drop all of them in the road. One of the pursuing vehicles hit them dead on causing it to flip through the air in a glorious explosion. The other pursuers swerved out of the way in time to not be affected by the fireball minus a little scorching. "So far this special car of yours is losing in coolness factor to everyday weapons. I thought you said this thing was, and I quote, 'the coolest.' Well, I'm waiting."

In response to the challenge Evelyn flipped a switch on the center console. On the rear of the car the previously mentioned shield slid into place forming a barricade between the incoming fire and the rear windshield. Karen thought it would have been cooler if she'd done that at the _start_ of the chase instead of waiting so long. The right for Evie to boast about how awesome her car is was taken away immediately afterwards when it became perfectly clear that the bullets were just going right through it. "That one was just a fluke." Evie said cutting off Karen's chance to gloat some more. She flipped the switch again causing the whole panel to detach from the car. It still managed to catch one of the drivers behind them directly in the windshield, most likely hitting the people inside as well. They didn't see what happened to it due to another very sharp curve in the road that would lead them towards the Griffith Observatory.

"Sorry, sweety. Still doesn't count." Karen snarked. "Last chance to show me something good."

Evie moved the car as fast as it could go uphill. The one advantage they seemed to have over their pursuers was that they were in a sports car built to take turns while the pursuing vehicle appeared to be an SUV which couldn't take them as quickly out of fear of toppling over. A decent-sized gap started to form between the vehicles. Exactly what Evie was wanting. She was ready to give Karen an "I told you so!" smirk when a car coming down the hilly road couldn't change course in time to avoid scraping down the entire driver side of the classic car. When it was gone so was the side mirror. Now she was on the receiving end of the "I told you so!" smirk when she and Karen met eyes.

At last they finally made it up to the flat terrain of the observatory's sizeable parking lot. Evie flipped the last switch on the console before hitting the emergency brake. The whole car rapidly spun 180 degrees, stopping so that it was able to face entrance to the parking. With only seconds to spare the enemy SUV came into view. Evie and Karen ducked from the machine gun fire that came immediately. Only now Evie was actually ready for them and pressed her thumbs down on the buttons in the steering wheel. Two .50 caliber heavy machine guns attached to either side of the bonnet roared to life. Karen peeked up enough to see the rounds shred the SUV into swiss cheese before causing the whole vehicle to explode in a grand wreck.

There was still a long pause where neither woman said a word. The air was filled with the sounds of the two catching their breath slightly. Evie was the first to finally speak up. "So….Does that pass your coolness test?"

"Came down to your last trick but you managed to pull it off. Color me impressed, Collins." Karen said with a bemused smile on her face.

Karen's smile was reciprocated with a smile from Evie. "Know what would make this occasion perfect?" she asked with a grin. Karen was about to ask what that would be but Evie held up the champagne bottle that had been in the car's cooler with a couple of glasses. "A little drink to celebrate a successful mission. Even if there were one or two hiccups." She handed one of the glasses to Karen. Using the car's dashboard as a makeshift bottle opener she poured a glass for each of them and sat the bottle back down in the cooler between them.

"I have no idea in hell how I'm gonna explain your side to my boss but we _did_ technically get what we wanted." Karen said, now with a cheerful grin of her own. "To a brighter future for all of us," she said raising her glass in a toast.

"A brighter future!" Evie cheered and then clanged glasses with her partner before taking a big sip of her drink.

Another long silence befell the interior of the car. Karen swished the liquid around her mouth a bit while Evie sniffed her glass and then sniffed the bottle itself. "Can I tell you something, Evelyn?" asked Karen.

"This is flat?"

"This is indeed flat." Karen said in rapid succession after Evie combined with nodding her head.

Silence once again came as Evie took a moment to take a deep breath. "Wanna get a beer?" she asked with another smile.

"That sounds absolutely perfect right now." Karen responded, actually laughing now. They both rolled down the windows and tossed out the flat champagne still left in their glasses. Evie put the car in gear again to head back to her apartment. "One out of three gadgets working still ain't bad."

"Thanks. That means a lot coming from you," said Evie appreciatively.

"You're quite welcome," Karen said as she took off the blonde wig on Evie's head. "Though I did tell you that it was just a prop."

"You just couldn't let that go, could you?"

"Nope."


End file.
